What Happens When an Empath Leaves a Narcissist: 17 Possibilities
Have you ever wondered what happens when an empath decides they’ve had enough of a narcissist?
It’s a decisive moment… One filled with various emotions, realizations, and newfound strength.
What changes?
What do they feel?
Empaths, known for their deep sensitivity and compassion, often endure much before reaching their breaking point.
But what happens next?
Do they find peace?
Do they reclaim their sense of self?
The journey from enduring manipulation to finding freedom is complex, and each step can bring about unexpected shifts.
How do they cope?
How do they heal?
Each empath’s experience is unique, yet there are common threads that weave through their stories. It’s a path of discovery, resilience, and a quest for true happiness…
Stay tuned to understand the many possibilities that unfold and what happens when an empath leaves a narcissist!
Why do empaths decide to leave their narcissistic partners?
Well, before anything, let’s try to answer why they came to this decision.
Why do empaths finally decide to leave their narcissistic partners?
It’s often a mix of exhaustion and self-realization… They give and give until there’s nothing left.
Imagine constantly walking on eggshells, always putting someone else’s needs before your own.
Sounds tiring, right?
Empaths reach a breaking point when they realize their own well-being matters, too! They start to see through the manipulation and gaslighting, recognizing that love shouldn’t feel this way.
The constant emotional drain, the lack of genuine care—it becomes too much. So, they muster the courage to prioritize themselves and seek the happiness they deserve.
It’s a tough decision but one that leads to healing and growth.
A study was done where participants described their relationships with narcissistic partners as both swift and vicious and slow and insidious. These relationships left them feeling worthless, confused, and anxious, with posttraumatic stress and suicidal ideation due to tormenting behaviors, blame-shifting, and lack of accountability.
What happens if you walk away from a narcissist?
Research highlight: A study discusses the negative effects on mental health that a relationship with a narcissistic partner holds in the short and long term. Hence, detaching from a narcissistic relationship is important and time-bound.
If you walk away from a narcissist, they may try hard to get you to come back to them. This could include anything from making you feel bad about yourself to threatening you.
You may have heard about the 21 stages of a narcissistic relationship with an empath, but breaking up such a relationship is a different struggle altogether.
In other words, detaching from a narcissist could be dangerous at times and cause you to feel unsafe in certain circumstances.
This answers the question of what happens when an empath leaves a narcissist, although the circumstances will be different from person to person.
17 things that can happen when an empath leaves a narcissist
So, what happens when an empath leaves a narcissist?
An empath soon will begin to notice that they are not being loved and treated the way that they need to be by a narcissist and will move on from the relationship.
An empath needs to be loved and be with someone who is who they claim to be, which is usually not the case for a narcissist. Here are 17 things that can happen when an empath discards a narcissist:
1. An empath will understand they were being used
When an empath leaving a narcissist situation occurs, it is generally because the empath is unable to take any additional abuse from the narcissist.
They may not feel like they are being treated properly and understand that they deserve to be with someone who cares.
Research was conducted to determine if empathic feelings fade over time, and it indicates that this is possible.
This could mean that an empath may become tired of dealing with the needs of a narcissist and must leave them to start a new chapter in their life.
2. The narcissist will try to guilt them
One of the first stages of leaving a narcissist will include you getting away from them. You may choose to end the relationship, move out, or cease contact with them. Once this occurs, they will likely begin trying to guilt you into feeling bad about yourself and how you treated them.
A narcissist will probably want you to think about how they are feeling since an empath is sensitive to the feelings of others.
They will also use the empath’s feelings against them. This is one of the main reasons why an empath and a narcissist shouldn’t date each other.
3. An empath may think they are narcissistic
As someone leaves an empath narcissist relationship, the empath may start to wonder if they are narcissistic as well and question themselves: “Can an empath be a narcissist?”
This is likely because if they were in a relationship with an individual with narcissism, they may have started to dull how they were feeling and mimicked how their mate was acting.
When they reflect on the pairing, an empath could notice that they were acting in a narcissistic manner also, which could leave them wondering if this is really who they are and questions such as “Am I a narcissist or an empath?”
You don’t have to think that you are a narcissist if you are simply acting like one to protect yourself from getting hurt.
Consider how you really feel and if you take other’s feelings and points of view into account. If you do either of these things, you are likely not a narcissist.
4. They will feel sorry for the narcissist
Another thing that answers the question of what happens when an empath leaves a narcissist is that the empath will probably feel sorry for the narcissist.
They might think they have treated them unfairly and worry about how they are doing. While this is okay, you should also consider how they treated you as well.
If a person doesn’t think about how they have affected you, you needn’t worry about them and how they are feeling. This is no longer your concern after you walk away from the relationship.
5. The empath might have many doubts
Something else that may happen is that an empath will have doubts about leaving the relationship. Being in a relationship with an empath can allow you to see that they are generally looking on the bright side of things and have a hopeful attitude in many cases.
This is why they may feel doubtful and think they may not have had it so bad in their relationship.
6. A narcissist will try to get you back
When you are thinking about what happens when an empath leaves a narcissist, the truth is that a narcissist can try to get the empath back. Some may ask, does the narcissist miss the empath? But that may not be entirely true.
They will do whatever they can to convince them to reconsider their duo, even if it means lying or telling them exactly what they want to hear.
A narcissist needs to be praised and adored, so when this is not happening, they will feel ill at ease. This makes it necessary for them to try to win back their former partner’s affection.
7. Empaths may rethink leaving
An empath may think they want to get back together with the narcissist that they ended their relationship with.
They may believe that the narcissist will change and that things will get better.
If you see this happening in your circle, you may want to provide empath protection from the narcissist so they reconsider getting back together with someone with whom they are not very compatible.
If you are an empath feeling like you want to get back together with the narcissist in your life, be sure to take all the time you need to decide. There’s no reason to go back to a narcissist after you leave them hastily. Consider all of your options first.
8. An empath may go back to the relationship
So, what else happens when an empath leaves a narcissist? The empath may go back to the narcissist. They might think they will be able to change the behavior of the narcissist, or they could still believe in them.
If you are an empath affected in this way, think about all you have been through in your relationship. Don’t think this type of behavior is what you deserve out of a mate.
Remember that a healthy relationship involves mutual respect and trust, which may not be something you get when you are in a relationship with a narcissist.
9. The narcissist will threaten the empath
In some cases, a narcissist may threaten an empath to get them to come back to them.
This is something that you don’t have to put up with, and if you are afraid for your life, you should make sure that you are protected and in a safe place where a narcissist will not be able to harm you.
10. Empaths will worry about the narcissist
Once you are considering what happens when an empath leaves a narcissist, you should understand that an empath will worry about the narcissist, how they are doing, and what will happen to them since the empath is no longer in the picture.
This is the empath’s nature since they tend to worry about their fellow human beings. At the same time, understand that a narcissist will be okay, even if they say they won’t.
11. A narcissist may eventually move on
Eventually, a narcissist will start to move on from their relationship with an empath.
They will likely find someone else to spend their time with or boss around, and they will let their previous partner go. This can be a good thing for the empath since they won’t have to be concerned about this mate any longer.
12. An empath will be concerned about how they are perceived
An empath might be upset and feel like they are affecting others with their decision to leave a narcissist. They might think they will upset the people they care about, which reflects poorly on them.
The truth is your loved ones will more than likely understand your point of view and support you in your decisions. You won’t have to feel like you let someone down because you ended a relationship that wasn’t good for you.
13. Empaths might have trouble adjusting to the changes
Even when an empath knows that they have made the best decision for their future, what happens when an empath leaves a narcissist could be that an empath has a tough time getting used to the changes that take place in their life afterward.
They may have to get used to not having to take care of a narcissist and all that this entails. It could take a while for them to overcome this.
14. An empath will move on
After a while, an empath will move on from their relationship with a narcissist. They may be able to find a mate who is better suited for them and treats them fairly and as equals.
If you are an empath, this might be something you are looking for, and you shouldn’t settle until you find it.
15. The empath may have learned a lot
Another thing revolving around what happens when an empath leaves a narcissist is that the empath will probably have learned a lot throughout the process.
They may be able to notice when they aren’t being treated well and could spot when an individual is taking their energy and kindness from them. This could allow an empath to work harder to find a relationship that is more advantageous for them.
16. The empath may start a healing process
The healing process for an empath involves confronting and processing the emotional trauma experienced in the relationship. This journey often includes seeking therapy, practicing self-care, and re-establishing personal boundaries.
It’s a time for empaths to reconnect with their own needs and values, often leading to significant personal growth.
Support from friends and family plays a crucial role in this recovery, helping empaths rebuild their sense of self and move forward with greater resilience and self-awareness.
17. There may be levels of increased self-discovery for both parties
For the empath, leaving a narcissistic relationship can spark a profound journey of self-discovery. They gain insights into their empathic nature, learn why they are drawn to certain personalities, and find answers to questions like “Why do empaths attract narcissists?”
This helps them understand the importance of prioritizing their own emotional well-being. The process promotes growth in self-esteem and decision-making.
Conversely, for the narcissist, such a breakup might prompt a rare moment of self-reflection. They may recognize the destructive patterns in their behavior, though this is less common.
For both, the end of the relationship can be a catalyst for personal evolution, albeit in very different ways.
7 ways an empath can get over a narcissist
Leaving a narcissist is a brave and challenging step for an empath. The journey to healing and moving on is often filled with emotional highs and lows… but it’s entirely possible.
Here are 7 ways an empath can get over a narcissist and reclaim their peace and happiness:
1. Seek professional help
How does an empath leave a narcissist and start healing? Therapy! Talking to a therapist can help you process the trauma and emotional manipulation you’ve endured.
They provide a safe space to vent, cry, and gain insights. It’s about understanding that what happened wasn’t your fault and learning healthy coping mechanisms.
A professional can guide you through the complexities of your emotions and help you rebuild your self-esteem. Remember, seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness!
You can start this way: Research local therapists who specialize in trauma and relationships. Many offer a free consultation to see if it’s a good fit. Online therapy is also an option if in-person sessions aren’t feasible.
2. Establish no contact
Cutting off all communication with the narcissist is crucial. No calls, texts, or social media interactions. It sounds harsh, but it’s necessary to break free from their influence. Keeping any form of contact can reopen wounds and set back your healing process.
Blocking them might feel extreme, but it prevents any chances of manipulation or emotional blackmail. This step is about protecting yourself and creating space for your recovery. Stay strong and prioritize your well-being.
You can start this way: Block their number, unfollow or block them on social media, and inform mutual friends of your decision. Consider changing your phone number if necessary.
3. Surround yourself with supportive people
Friends and family who truly care can be your biggest support system. Share your feelings, and let them know what you’re going through. They can offer comfort, advice, and a sense of normalcy.
Having a strong support network helps remind you of your worth and value. They can also help you stay firm in your decision to leave and not go back. Surrounding yourself with love and positivity makes a huge difference in your healing journey.
You can start this way: Reach out to close friends or family members and let them know you need their support. Plan regular meet-ups or calls to stay connected and feel supported.
4. Focus on self-care
Taking care of yourself is crucial. Whether it’s taking long baths, reading a good book, or picking up a new hobby… Find activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Self-care isn’t just about pampering; it’s about nurturing your mind and soul.
Eat well, sleep enough, and exercise. These small steps can greatly improve your mental and physical health. Prioritizing self-care helps you reconnect with yourself and rebuild your inner strength.
You can start this way: Make a list of activities you enjoy and schedule time for them each week. Create a daily routine that includes exercise, healthy meals, and relaxation techniques.
In this talk, motivational speaker Puck Kroonsberg takes you on a personal journey: remembering who you truly are. Watch the video:
5. Educate yourself about narcissism
Understanding what you’ve been through can be incredibly validating. Read books, watch videos, and join support groups about narcissistic abuse. Knowledge is empowering!
It helps you see that you’re not alone and that many others have been through similar experiences. Learning about narcissistic behaviors can also help you recognize red flags in the future.
The more you know, the better equipped you are to avoid falling into similar patterns again.
You can start this way: Look for books and online resources about narcissistic abuse. Join online support groups or forums where you can share experiences and gain insights from others.
6. Journal your thoughts and feelings
Writing down your experiences and emotions can be therapeutic. It’s a private way to express everything you’re feeling without any judgment. Reflecting on your journey can help you understand your emotions better and track your progress.
Journaling can also serve as a reminder of how far you’ve come and the strength you possess. It’s a safe space to pour out your heart and find clarity amidst the chaos. Plus, it’s a great way to vent!
You can start this way: Set aside time each day or week to write in your journal. Use prompts to get started, such as “Today, I feel…” or “What I learned from this experience is…”
7. Set new goals and focus on the future
Look ahead and plan for a future that excites you. Set personal and professional goals… What have you always wanted to do?
Now’s the time! Focusing on new ambitions can help shift your mind from past pain to future possibilities. It’s about rebuilding your life and creating a path that brings you happiness and fulfillment.
Small steps toward these goals can bring a sense of accomplishment and hope. Embrace this fresh start and pursue what truly makes you happy.
You can start this way: Identify one or two goals you’re passionate about. Break them down into smaller, manageable steps and create a timeline for achieving them. Celebrate each milestone along the way.
Choosing the best course
Choosing the best course after leaving a narcissist is all about prioritizing your well-being and personal growth. Remember, healing is not a linear process, and it’s okay to take small steps.
Seeking professional help, establishing no contact, surrounding yourself with supportive people, and focusing on self-care are essential steps.
Educating yourself about narcissism and journaling your feelings can provide clarity and validation. Setting new goals and looking toward a brighter future will help you regain your strength and confidence.
Trust yourself and be patient… Each step you take brings you closer to a happier, healthier you. You’ve got this!
How can I avoid attracting another narcissistic partner in the future?
Jenni Jacobsen
Licensed Clinical Social Worker
Expert Answer
Learn the signs of narcissistic personality disorder in relationships: moving extremely quickly in the beginning, showering you with love and affection, and making grand promises for the future. Be wary of any relationship that starts like this. It's also important to work on yourself and become comfortable asserting yourself and setting boundaries. Narcissists want someone who will meet their every demand without question. If you have firm boundaries and aren't afraid to stand up for your own needs, a narcissist won't be interested.
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