10 Tips to Improve Mental Health in Marriage

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One of the most overlooked things about a married relationship is mental wellness. Couples nowadays are so busy with various other things that they fail to maintain healthy relationships, which sometimes results from neglected mental health in marriage, causing various conflicts.

As many couples or individuals fail to remain mentally strong, they go into depression, have fights, isolate themselves from social gatherings, and divorce in the worst case.

Moreover, having an unstable relationship that has frequent arguments and fights usually leaves their kids worried and depressed on a long-term basis.

Also, mental health professionals suggest that staying mentally healthy is the only key to happiness in your married life.

Of course, there are times when your thoughts will contradict your partner, and you might have to make decisions that are not in your favor; still, you can find something which will eventually benefit you and your partner in terms of mental health in marriage.

To avoid an argument, you’ll often have to step into your partner’s shoes, understand their perspective, and act accordingly.

This will give you a better understanding of the scenario and help you make better decisions.

The sad part, however, is that we neither know how to balance happy relationships nor make any efforts to maintain positive mental health in marriage for ourselves and our partners.

What is mental health in marriage?

The mental wellness definition is based on the idea of being in a positive and healthy state of mind in a relationship. 

With good mental health wellness, one is not plagued by negative thoughts or mental ailments. You can take steps to move positively towards your relationship goals without negativity and unhealthy thoughts getting in the way. 

So, what is mental wellness in a marriage?

Mental health and wellness in marriage refer to the couple having a healthy attitude that helps them strengthen their bond and works towards their common goal without doubts and negativity getting in the way.

According to Grady Shumway, a licensed mental health counselor:

Mental health in marriage encompasses both partners’ overall well-being and a positive mindset. It means being free from persistent negative thoughts or mental health challenges, allowing both individuals to pursue their relationship goals collaboratively.

In essence, mental wellness in a marriage is characterized by a healthy attitude that fosters a strong bond, enabling the couple to navigate challenges together without doubts or negativity hindering their progress.

What is an example of mental wellness?

Good mental health examples in marriage are when couples can handle their conflicts calmly and healthily. You don’t allow negative thoughts full of doubts and insecurities to harm the relationship. Instead, you focus on solutions and the positives. 

Understanding why is mental wellness important is wrapped up in knowing these mental wellness examples, as they showcase what a difference it can make. Mental illness in relationships can significantly harm a couple’s bond if proper steps aren’t taken. 

How are mental wellness and emotional wellness different?

Emotional wellness refers to the ability to handle your emotions and feelings in a positive and balanced manner. 

Mental wellness, on the other hand, refers to the ability to handle all aspects of life and its stresses. It affects your ability to make the right decisions and handle the various events in your life and relationship.

10 tips to improve mental health in marriage

We usually remember the crazy times when we overreacted in a situation, and it is really difficult to wonder what the mindset was during that time. Most regret it later and think, “I shouldn’t have reacted that way.”

To ensure that you don’t have regrets in the future, here is a list of some tips that will help you to stay mentally strong throughout your married life.

It’s time to kick out anxiety and signs of depression from our lives. So, let’s get started with some mental health in marriage tips!

1. Stop analyzing everything

Being an introvert is not bad, as you might have a better idea of life, but there is no need to overthink and analyze everything you are undergoing.

Stop wasting time over-analyzing everything. It is the best way to improve your mental well-being. 

If your partner says no to a movie, it doesn’t mean they’re no longer interested in you or are fed up with you. Rather it might mean they are stressed out due to their hectic office schedule.

Related Reading: 10 Ways Marriage and Mental Health Are Codependent

2. Don’t stick to the past

To justify a thing, you can’t always stick to the past and come up with pointless instances that happened a long time back. Stop sticking to it; it’s in the past – let it stay there.

A mentally strong person will never bring instances from the past in between an argument as this will end up with no conclusion.

Rather, you need to work on the argument, find its core reason, and settle with a good solution instead of pulling on the past repeatedly.

Grady Shumway, LMHC further shares:

Don’t dwell on the past. Bringing up old grievances during discussions only prolongs conflict and prevents resolution. A mentally strong person focuses on the present issues, seeking to understand the core reason behind the argument.

Then, they work toward a constructive solution rather than getting sidetracked by past instances. Letting go of past grievances promotes healthier communication and strengthens the relationship.

3. Complete yourself on your own

Many people start believing their partner is responsible for their happiness and feel incomplete in their absence.

So, how to improve a marriage?

You must understand that you are complete by yourself, live how you love and eat, sleep, and relax how you feel comfortable. Don’t simply hand over the key to your happiness and freedom in someone else’s hands.

You undoubtedly love and respect your partner, but only you can complete yourself by remaining the way you are. Don’t rely on your partner blindly for your mental health in marriage.

4. Don’t make your partner feel low

To justify our point, most of us put our partners down. But this might be the biggest issue that can cause future problems in your marriage and your mental health. 

After all, it is easy to find faults in others and blame them, but this only results in broken relationships and divorces. This defines what is good mental health in a relationship. 

Instead of blaming your partner for certain things, you must not put them down, as you need to lift the other person and explain to them calmly where they went wrong.

Talk calmly to them and with patience. It might sort out things even before you were expecting.

Related Reading: Here’s Why You Shouldn’t Try to Change Your Partner

5. Don’t involve the third one

Happy couples usually don’t involve or seek suggestions from someone else while they are in the middle of an argument. This does not refer to experts who offer marital counseling. 

You are in trouble, so the two of you have to sort it out yourselves; no third person can understand better than you do.

Instead of asking a third person to advise you, sit with your partner, calm down, and discuss things properly while keeping useless points aside.

Involving a third person will only bring distance in your married life and hamper your mental health in marriage.

However, in this scenario, do not confuse a counselor or a therapist as a third person.

Unless you and your partner cannot solve your problems, looking for professional help is always advised.

6. Healthy and regular communication

No matter how busy of a work life you have, talk to your partner.

These small distances will eventually become big troubles, affecting your married life and your kids- their childhood experiences, academic performance, and social lives.

Discuss everything with your partner, open up, and express what you are uncomfortable sharing. This will help you build trust and healthy communication with your partner.

7. Spend time with family

On weekends or evenings, plan something regularly. Take your kids outside and have a great time with them. This will make them feel special and strengthen your relationship with your partner.

Instead of lying on the couch and browsing your social media accounts, invest in having a good time with your partner and making them feel special.

Whenever you feel that things are not working out or one of you seems constantly frustrated, simply sit and freely express yourself before the small issues take the form of big ones.

If you keep talking regularly to your partner, your issues will gradually subside, and you will have a healthier relationship with your partner.

It’s better to work on your concerns or issues daily and maintain a healthy relationship with your partner from day one. This automatically will result in your optimal mental wellness and that of your partner.

Related Reading: 5 Benefits of Spending Time With Family

8. Practice forgiveness

Research shows that holding onto resentment adds to mental stress and negatively impacts mental health in a relationship.

Make an active effort to forgive your partner for the mistake that they may have made, especially if they have expressed remorse. It will remove the weight of resentment and help you move toward a healthier state of mental health.

9. Set healthy boundaries

Setting healthy boundaries in a relationship can enhance mental wellness in marriage. It can make you feel safer in the relationship as your personal boundaries are better protected once your partner knows and respects them. 

10. Express your gratitude

Gratitude is a great way to enhance mental health in marriage, as it can address the insecurities and doubts that may otherwise threaten mental health in marriage. 

Gratitude helps couples feel validated and seen by their partner. 

Related Reading: 10 Ways to Show Gratitude to Your Spouse

Watch this video to learn how gratitude rewires your brain:

What is the effect of mental health on marriage?

Mental health greatly impacts marriage, as it can give a couple the strength to cope with any problem that might crop up. Without this, couples might start growing apart or developing resentments over time. 

Final takeaway

Learning how mental health affects relationships is important, as it can make or break them. 

If mental wellness in marriage is ignored, it can aggravate any issue that may crop up and shift focus from seeking solutions. Follow the tips mentioned above to improve the mental wellness in your relationship and strengthen your bond further.