Are You A Sadist Or A Masochist In A Relationship Quiz

Juliana Alpízar
Verified Marriage & Family Therapist Reviewed By
Juliana Alpízar, Sex Therapist
Juliana Alpízar
Sex Therapist
Verified Marriage & Family Therapist Review Board Member

Juliana Alpízar is a Sexologist and Coach specializing in unconventional sexual practices. She uses her knowledge in Communication and coaching to support individuals,... Read More

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Marriage.com Editorial Team
Marriage.com Editorial Team
Marriage.com Editorial Team
Expertise: Relationship & Marriage Advice

The Marriage.com Editorial Team is a group of experienced relationship writers, experts, and mental health professionals. We provide practical and research-backed advice on relationships. Our content is thoroughly reviewed by experts to ensure that we offer high-quality and reliable relationship advice.

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20 Questions | Total Attempts: 20977 | Updated: Jan 15, 2025
Are You a Sadist or a Masochist in a Relationship Quiz

Relationships are a mix of emotions, desires, and dynamics, often shaped by what brings someone fulfillment.

Ever noticed how some people thrive on taking charge while others find comfort in yielding?

Maybe you’ve wondered about your own tendencies—what excites, satisfies, or challenges you the most. This quiz is not about labels or judgment; it’s a lighthearted way to explore whether you lean more toward a sadist or a masochist mindset in your relationship.

Ready to discover something new about yourself?

Questions Excerpt

1. How do you feel when your partner gives you a compliment?

A. I enjoy the recognition but prefer to maintain control over the exchange.

B. I feel deeply appreciated and sometimes undeserving of their praise.

C. I feel genuinely valued and reciprocate their kindness.

2. How do you feel about the balance of power in your relationship?

A. I prefer to have the upper hand and feel uneasy when it is challenged.

B. I am comfortable with my partner taking the lead, even if I feel overpowered at times.

C. I strive for a dynamic where both partners share power equally.

3. How do you react when your partner needs reassurance?

A. I provide support but prefer to set boundaries around their dependence.

B. I give them all the reassurance they need, sometimes neglecting my own needs.

C. I offer reassurance while also encouraging them to find inner strength.

4. How do you feel about your partner expressing independence in the relationship?

A. I feel a slight discomfort but strive to keep some control.

B. I feel reassured by their independence, even if it makes me a bit insecure.

C. I celebrate their autonomy and see it as a sign of a healthy relationship.

5. When disagreements escalate, what is your typical approach?

A. I take charge and aim to resolve it on my terms.

B. I back down quickly to avoid further conflict.

C. I seek to de-escalate the situation by addressing the root cause together.

6. How do you respond when your partner surprises you with something thoughtful?

A. I acknowledge their effort but sometimes prefer to steer the focus back to my preferences.

B. I feel deeply moved and make sure they know how much I appreciate it.

C. I reciprocate the gesture and cherish the thoughtfulness equally.

7. When your partner asks for space, how do you react?

A. I feel the need to assert my presence and maintain influence.

B. I feel uneasy, but I give them the space they need.

C. I respect their request and focus on my own needs during that time.

8. How do you feel when your partner relies on you for a major decision?

A. I thrive on responsibility and enjoy leading the way.

B. I feel reassured by their trust but sometimes doubt my abilities.

C. I feel confident discussing the options and finding the best solution together.

9. How do you handle situations where your partner expresses dissatisfaction?

A. I address it directly, often setting the tone for the resolution.

B. I take responsibility, even if the issue is not entirely my fault.

C. I listen carefully and work together to resolve their concerns.

10. When planning something special for your partner, what is your approach?

A. I take the lead and decide on the details to surprise them.

B. I follow their preferences to ensure they feel catered to.

C. I involve them in the process of creating a shared experience.

11. How do you feel when your partner is emotionally vulnerable with you?

A. I feel a sense of power and control in supporting them.

B. I feel comforted and reassured by their openness.

C. I feel a mix of emotions but try to stay balanced.

12. How do you feel about the idea of dependence in a relationship?

A. I enjoy it when my partner depends on me for guidance and support.

B. I am comfortable depending on my partner for emotional reassurance.

C. I believe in interdependence, where both partners support each other equally.

13. When your partner makes a mistake, how do you react?

A. I feel compelled to point it out and correct them.

B. I tend to excuse their behavior and let it go.

C. I address it respectfully and work together to resolve it.

14. How do you respond to your partner's achievements or successes?

A. I feel proud and take some credit for their growth.

B. I feel genuinely happy and let them take all the credit.

C. I celebrate with them and reflect on how we contributed together.

15. What is your approach to expressing love in your relationship?

A. I enjoy showing my affection in ways that assert my role.

B. I often express my love by putting my partner's needs first.

C. I ensure my expressions of love reflect mutual respect and care.

16. How do you handle compromises in your relationship?

A. I usually influence the outcome to align with my preferences.

B. I often yield to avoid unnecessary conflict.

C. I aim to find a middle ground that works for both.

17. In your intimate moments, how do you feel most connected?

A. By taking control and setting the tone.

B. By surrendering and trusting my partner completely.

C. By creating a shared, balanced experience.

18. How do you react when your partner asks for emotional support?

A. I enjoy being the one they lean on and guiding them through it.

B. I feel fulfilled by supporting them, even if it is challenging.

C. I provide support while maintaining my emotional boundaries.

19. What is your response when a conflict arises between you and your partner?

A. I assertively state my point and take the lead in resolving it.

B. I find myself giving in to maintain harmony.

C. I try to balance both perspectives and find a fair resolution.

20. How do you usually approach decision-making in your relationship?

A. I prefer to take charge and set the direction.

B. I often defer to my partner's preferences.

C. I like to collaborate and make joint decisions.


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