5 Hurdles and 5 Benefits of Marriage Restoration

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Marriage restoration happens once a brief period of time has passed after a mutual separation. It takes place with the involvement of your closest support systems, counselors and the commitment of both the partners. 

There is no guarantee of a smooth ride after that and you have to act to keep the fire burning, especially if unfaithfulness was part of the reason for separation. The bottom line is that there is hope despite all the challenges both of you have had to undergo. 

What does marriage restoration mean?

Restoration of marriage simply means reinstating the marital bond between two people after a period of disagreement or separation. Marriage restoration after divorce or separation takes place through willingness from both partners, support from families and proper guidance of counselors through marriage therapy. 

It involves certain steps to complete the process of marriage restoration once both parties agree to it. Most importantly, the partners should be willing to get back together as a couple in marriage restored after divorce.

5 major hurdles you can face during marriage restoration

It is not easy to restore a broken marriage and requires a lot of strength to bring back the lost affection into a relationship. Stories of restored marriages after separation can give an account of certain challenges faced frequently.

Let’s look into the major hurdles a couple can face while undergoing marriage restoration.

1. Trust and security

Once you have undergone all the processes while in a healthy separation, you have to rebuild your trust towards each other. Infidelity, for example, leads to the destruction of feelings and a lack of trust. 

The person who broke the marriage covenant must prove this through actions. Ask for forgiveness as your spouse unconditionally accepts the pardon. It is not the right time to project one’s feelings but a time to accept the apologies and forge ahead as husband and wife.

2. Need for unconditional support

 Hope is the first step into a fruitful married life after betrayal and mistrust. The wounded partner faces confusion, with several questions in mind, trying to find faults on one’s threat to sexual identity that caused immorality in the family. 

This is the time the affected partner requires the spouse’s shoulder to lean on for reassurance of an intact emotional space and keep the marriage restored.

Related Reading: How to Love Your Spouse Unconditionally

3. Facing the reality

Marriage restoration or restored marriages requires more of the practical part of the marital vows. The initial stages are faced with doubts, at the same time; a partner might have made a promise that they may find difficult to sustain. 

This is the point one faces a mix-up and dilemma because of the fear of divorce. A sense of emotional distance is expected but with support from both parties, it can finally be a smooth ride.

4. Lost confidence

The moment the marital bed is defiled, automatically there is no confidence, yet it is an essential virtue in marriage restoration. It will take time to attain normalcy in the relationship depending on acceptance and forgiveness of the aggrieved partner to forget and forge ahead. 

Genuine engagement and reassurance of a “changed mind” is the ultimate solution to a fulfilling marriage after breaking the marital covenant.

Related Reading: How to Be a Confident Wife in Your Marriage

5. Maintaining equations with families

Marriage restoration tests the trust factor of not just the partners but also their families. Once broken, it can be hard to maintain the same level of respect and affection with each other’s close circle of friends and family.

The family can also get more skeptical about the two of you getting back together since they do not want their loved one to suffer again.

Related Reading: 10 Family Values That Help You Forever in Life

5 major benefits of marriage restoration

Marriage is a longtime commitment that demands a lot of understanding, love and respect from both partners. Breaking that commitment can leave the individuals brokenhearted. There’s no doubt marriage restoration brings in a lot of benefits in that regard.

1. Renewed love

You have seen marriage from both a negative and a positive angle, the fact that you have managed to restore it means you have a renewed sense of love giving you a chance to explore each other’s personalities more.

You can appreciate each other’s strengths and fill up for each other’s weaknesses leading to a fulfilling marriage.

Related Reading: 18 Ways to Keep Your Love Alive in Marriage

2. Openness

You can now talk freely without any fear and of course, with more love and respect since you are precautious. This time, you may not have any reservations on how your partner may take your opinion. 

You can now comfortably discuss your issues and even engage in healthy arguments over different schools of thought to come up with a solution comfortable for both parties.

3. Honesty

If you can handle unfaithfulness until your partner confesses and asks for forgiveness, it opens your heart for change or enhances one’s wishes in life. 

You can expect more honesty from each other in matters of personal and professional choices. You feel a renewed sense of confidence and support for your partner in their high and low moments.

Related Reading: Unflinching Honesty About Marriage, Motherhood and Mourning

4. Trust

A successfully restored marriage enjoys all the conviction from both partners. You have no secrets in the family, which can bring insecurities or doubt. It allows married couples to share responsibilities without anyone feeling burdened. This is when you can trust your partner over finances and other crucial topics.

Watch this video by relationship consultant Geoffrey Setiawan to learn more about rebuilding trust in marriage:

5. A fresh start

This is logically the best thing about marriage restoration. After all the ups and downs, you both get an opportunity to start your life afresh. Marriage restoration stories also give instances of replenished hope in life.

Get over the past but be mindful of the previous mistakes in order to not repeat them. Embrace this new phase of life with your spouse and make the best out of it.

Related Reading: 10 Ways on How to Reset Your Marriage

10 useful steps for marriage restoration

It’s natural to have differences in a marriage leading to arguments and temporary rift. But a healthy marriage is one that bounces back after the troubles, finding common ground of understanding. Try to look for healthy ways how to repair marriage.

Marriage restoration doesn’t happen overnight, it takes time and patience. Let’s look at some such steps that leads to a healthy, restored marriage.

• Having faith
• Identifying the problem
• Working on self
• Discussion
• Intimacy
• Quality time
• Staying fit
• Avoiding blame game
• Confess
• Professional counseling

Powerful prayers for marriage restoration 

Religious institutions play a key role, through faithful counseling, in allowing couples solve their conflicts from a spiritual perspective, without separation. If all partners believe in the same Supreme Being then the power of faith in marriage restoration directs them to the right path.

There are scriptures on marriage restoration that talks about how to know when your marriage is beyond repair and how to restore a marriage. Devotion and faith can help restore passion in marriage after divorce. 

In fact, forgiveness is an act of faith, as long as all parties open up and accept their role in marriage hurdles then restoring the marriage institution works to their benefit. It is a process that requires love and respect in marriage.

You can try powerful marriage restoration prayers to strengthen your fragile marriage over time. You can add your details while reciting these prayers to make them more specific. Reciting a prayer for marriage restoration can make you feel stronger and more positive.

Some questions

• What are the hardest stages of marriage?

As per the relationship therapist Aimee Hartstein, the first year of marriage is considered to be the hardest. This is basically because a couple is not accustomed to each other’s habits and preferences. Secondly, the year when a couple has their first child can be equally hard.

• How do you heal a broken marriage?

It’s not easy to fix a failing marriage. You need to invest time in identifying the main problem areas and coming up with practical solutions to them. Introspect and see what all you can change to save your marriage.

Show your love and care to your partner and spend more time together remembering the reasons you decided to be together in the first place.

Marriage restoration is a second chance at life

Marriage restoration after a betrayal of one’s trust entirely relies on willingness and forgiveness which is a process you need to nurture. You do not expect to have an instant change of heart or situation.

Any effort towards a change in character for the better requires patience and appreciation to boost one’s morale and determination. After some time, with all the efforts and emotions, you get to enjoy the perks of a restored marriage.