15 Tips For Couples to Make Sex More Romantic and Intimate

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You and your partner have great sex. You know exactly how to please one another, and you’ve definitely shared some hot experiences. But steamy sex isn’t always about reaching an orgasm. Sometimes, the best sex is the kind where you connect with your spouse on an emotional level.

Romantic sex is fantastic. It’s all about foreplay, building anticipation, and connecting emotionally.

Everyone loves being romanced every once in a while. That’s why we’re showing you 8 of the best romantic sex tips for romance in bed and how to add a little romance into the bedroom.

What is romantic sex for most of us?

Romantic sex conjures up these images for most couples:

• Long sunset walks along silky smooth soft white beaches
• Bouquets of long-stemmed red roses arriving for you at home or at your workplace
• A box of exquisite Swiss dark milk chocolates delivered to your door
• A candlelit dinner composed of your favorite foods and champagne

All of these scenarios are followed by the most tender, loving, and fabulous sex imaginable.

How much sex is enough for couples?

Before we delve into ideas to enhance romantic sex in marriage, let’s first understand that everyone creates a personalized mind map of what romance is.

Your idea of what is romantic may be very different than that of your BFFs, which may be very different than what your office mates’ idea of what constitutes something romantic, and so on.

So, how to have romantic sex when there is no one size fits all solution to fix a bland relationship?  

As per the research, two to three times a week is common for couples between 20 to 30 years old, and for couples between 40 and 50 year old, once a week is okay and usual.

15 romantic sex tips for couples to make sex more romantic and intimate

How to do romantic sex? 

Elements that lead to romantic sex are a little bit like one of those very long, confusing menus you get at restaurants.  Let’s look at some of the romantic sex ideas for couples to rekindle the heat in your relationship. 

1. Build your emotional connection

Having romantic sex with your partner is all about being vulnerable with each other. It’s about using sex as a way to connect on a deeper level. It’s an expression of love, instead of solely a way to climax.

Emotional intimacy and sex work in a circular motion. Studies show that sexual satisfaction predicted heightened emotional intimacy in couples. So, the better sex you’re having, the closer your emotional connection will be.

Similarly, the closer your emotional connection, the more amazing sex you’ll have! It’s a win-win.

The best way to build up your emotional connection is by spending quality time together. Do things you enjoy, take up new hobbies, and practice a regular date night each week.

2. Set the mood

If you want to have romantic sex, you need to set the mood. After all, it’s hard to focus on making love with your partner while your phones are blowing up, the TVs on in the background, or you have a limited time to get down to business.

Create a romantic atmosphere by dimming the lights, putting on some soft music, and lighting some candles.

Kiss and build sexual anticipation by flirting throughout the day.

Make it a date.

Romantic sex is best had when you have the proper time to devote to your spouse.

Did you just order take-out? Are your friends coming over in a bit? Have to leave for work soon? Nothing ruins bedroom romance quite like being on a timer.

Related Reading: The Secret for a Healthy Sex Life

3. Practice romantic foreplay

One of the best romantic sex tips on how to make sex more romantic is to practice foreplay. Take your time while focusing on your partner’s pleasure. Kiss, touch, and explore each other. Don’t rush through it in favor of the big finale.

Not only will this make sex feel more intense and exciting for both partners, but it also gives them the opportunity to spend more time connecting on an emotional level.

4. Communicate about sex

If you want to get the most out of your sex life, one of the romantic sex tips is that you must be willing to communicate.

Communicating about sex boosts relationship quality and sexual satisfaction in a marriage.

There are many reasons why you and your partner should practice healthy sexual communication.

For a start, it will help you both be better lovers. The more you come to know what turns your partner on, the better you will be at pleasing them. Sexual communication can also help you avoid awkward misunderstandings between the sheets!

Talking about sex can also boost your egos and make sex feel more enjoyable. Studies show that women who have a positive view of themselves sexually report higher levels of romantic and passionate lovemaking and are easier to sexually arouse.

Related Reading: Tips to Spice Up Your Married Life

5. Make contact

The eyes are the windows to the souls. Nothing makes you feel more vulnerable or connected to your partner than maintaining eye-contact during intercourse.

Kissing is another great way to boost romance during sex. Studies show that kissing also boosts happiness by activating the brain’s reward system.

Talking during romantic sex is another way to deepen your intimate connection.

Skip cuss words and dirty talk and focus on the sweeter aspect of naughty talk.

Be verbal, moan, tell your partner you love the way their body feels. Say I love you. These are guaranteed ways to be romantic in bed and bring a little romance into your sex life.

6. Turn the lights on

For many, turning the lights on during intercourse is a major “no-no,” but in order to make sex more romantic, you must be willing to be vulnerable with your partner. You don’t have to use full light, but a lamp, nightlight, string lights, or pillar candles will add a romantic ambiance to the room.

Adding light to the room will also help you and your partner to be able to see each other during the act, which can increase your vulnerability and make your session feel more special.

Related Reading: The Role of Sex in Relationships 

7. The art of touch

One of the best romantic sex tips for romantic sex and bringing romance into the bedroom is to focus on nonsexual touching. Studies show that physical affection outside of sex can do wonders for your relationship. Caressing, giving massages, cuddling, hugging, kissing on the face, and holding hands have been strongly linked to partner satisfaction.

Holding with someone you love lowers your blood pressure and reduces stress, which makes it easier for partners to connect during romantic sex and leave the worries of the day behind.

8. Don’t rush foreplay

How to be romantic during sex?

Foreplay is something that builds the heat. So, one of the romantic sex tips is unless you go for a full-fleged foreplay, it will be hard to enjoy the real sex. Romance before sex. Take time and pleasure yourself and your partner.

Check out these foreplay ideas for an awesome night:

9. Make your environment more romantic

Where do you feel that you are your best romantic self? Is it at home in your own bed, or is it in a totally different locale, where the newness adds to the romantic climate?  

If it is at home, do you like to include music, different lighting, crisp linen sheets, and flowers on the bed stand?

Do you create a romantic environment to heighten the evening (or afternoon, morning, well, whenever)?  Or does your romantic spot involve being whisked away to somewhere you have never been before?

Related Reading: 7 Steps to Build up Romance Before Sex

10. Amp up your wardrobe

Do you feel most romantic wearing something sexy and revealing (if you’re a woman) or dapper and suave a la James Bond (if you’re a man)?

Sure, these sound like stereotypical seduction garb, but there is a reason.

Many people feel more amorous when the clothes they are wearing reflect their feelings of romance. Men and women may feel romantic wearing jeans and tee-shirts too.

Clothing does not have to be thongs, g-strings and skimpy lingerie to be sexy! Some people find getting dressed up in costumes can be exciting.  

• Romeo and Juliet?
• Cleopatra and Mark Antony?
• Scarlett and Rhett?

Discover what attire makes you feel sexy and go for it!

11. Create a befitting prelude to making love

What you do before the culmination of your romantic evening certainly is a form of foreplay, and is almost as important as the real foreplay.

What do you both enjoy doing?  

A filet mignon and truffles dinner at the Chateau d’Amor, a fancy expensive French eatery, or a dine and dash Double Double hamburger, shake and fries at the local In-N-Out?  Or something in between?

All of these options are what make for your own personal romance.

The atmosphere of the dining spot can add to the romantic feel of the evening.

A good view, the sound of waves in the distance, discreet lighting, comfortable seating, and attentive (or inattentive!) service can all add up to a wonderful start to a night of romance.  

And after that dinner, how about a movie?  

While chick flicks are always romantic, it might be time for a romantic film with a more universal appeal.  Always a good bet: “Casablanca”.

12. Discover your language of love®

Nothing is more important in any relationship than clear communication and discovering each other’s language of love.®

Importantly enough, elements of romantic sex include honest and open communication, love, shared interests, and mutuality in the relationship as the other cogs in the wheel of relationship bliss. 

But sometimes talking too much about a relationship quells the romance, so opinion is really mixed about how much you should discuss your romantic life with your partner. Nevertheless, romance leading to sex makes for combustible chemistry between couples.

The Gottman Institute, for example, states that you should, “have continuous conversations about sexual intimacy”, but some people would not be comfortable with non-stop conversations about sex.

A good balance of topics and flirtatious banter would make for very romantic foreplay for most couples.

13. Don’t sidestep the epilogue 

Just as good foreplay is to romantic sex, the time after sex is equally important. The afterglow is indeed often a time for an honest heart to heart conversations.

Due to certain chemicals released during the climax, you may feel closer than ever to your partner at this time.

Depending upon the mood, you and your partner can discuss:

• What felt good
• What you would like to try again
• Maybe broach the topic of new things you would like to try in your intimate relationship

Of course, some people may just want to sleep, so be sure to recognize if this is the case and do not carry on like a chatterbox! 

14. Tell what you want

How to be romantic in bed? Be vocal to your partner about what you want from them, what makes you feel hot and gives you immense pleasure. 

It gets easier for both of you to be on the same page when it comes to intimacy and avoid the extra efforts or the guess game.

15. Enjoy the moment

It goes without saying that fast sex isn’t romantic sex. If you feel yourself close to finishing, but your partner isn’t there yet, stop, calm down, and start again. Enjoy the moment.

Orgasms are fun, but they shouldn’t necessarily be the sole purpose of your lovemaking.

Of course, everyone wants to “cross the finish line,” but don’t get so caught up in making fireworks that you lose sight of the amazing connection you’re sharing with your spouse.

Related Reading: 100 Sexy Texts for Her to Drive Her Wild

Takeaway

Romantic sex is, after all, about sharing a moment with the love of your life. It’s about experiencing something together. Savor it as best you can!

When it comes to having romantic sex, remember that your emotional connection is everything – so build on it! Have a regular date night, explore nonsexual physical touching, and communicate as though your life depends on it. By following these romantic sex tips and things to do during sex, you and your partner will be sharing the most romantic sex of your life.