3 Types of Men Most Likely to Have Affairs and How to Know

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Infidelity, a subject as old as marriage itself, continues to be a significant issue in many relationships today. While both men and women can be unfaithful, various studies and expert opinions often focus on the reasons why men, in particular, might choose to have affairs. 

Understanding the dynamics behind these actions can be complex, as the reasons are as diverse as the individuals involved. 

So, let’s shed light on some of the potential reasons why men have affairs, the statistics surrounding the prevalence of infidelity among married men, the types of men most likely to have affairs, and the signs that might indicate a partner is engaging in an affair.

7 potential reasons why men have affairs

Understanding “Why do married men cheat?” is complex, as the motivations behind such actions vary greatly from one individual to another. While no excuse justifies infidelity, exploring the reasons can provide insights into the challenges within a relationship. 

From the types of guys who cheat to the different types of affairs, the spectrum of unfaithfulness is broad. Here are 7 possible reasons why men might choose to have an affair with someone, shedding light on the diverse motivations that drive men away from their commitments.

1. Lack of emotional connection

Men may feel an emotional void in their relationships, leading them to seek understanding, affection, and validation from someone outside their partnership. 

The search for a deeper emotional connection can stem from feeling neglected, misunderstood, or undervalued by their partners, pushing them toward someone who appears to offer the empathy and support they crave.

2. Sexual dissatisfaction

A significant number of affairs are driven by sexual needs and desires not being met within the primary relationship. 

Whether it’s the desire for more frequent sexual encounters, exploration of unfulfilled fantasies, or simply seeking a physical connection that’s lost at home, men may pursue affairs seeking sexual satisfaction and excitement.

3. Opportunity and temptation

For some men, the decision to engage in an affair isn’t premeditated but rather arises from a situation where the opportunity presents itself, and the temptation is too strong to resist. 

It could be due to spending time in environments where they are away from their partner, such as business trips or social outings, where the likelihood of forming new intimate connections increases.

4. Seeking validation

Engaging in an affair can be a way for men to feel more desirable, successful, or valued, especially if they perceive these aspects to be lacking in their current relationship. 

The affirmation and ego boost received from someone new can be a powerful motivator, leading them to seek validation outside their marriage.

5. Boredom and desire for excitement

The monotony of daily life and the predictability of a long-term relationship can lead some men to seek out the thrill and novelty of an affair. The excitement of new romantic encounters and the secrecy involved can provide a temporary escape from the routine of their everyday lives.

6. Emotional or physical disconnection

When there’s a significant gap in emotional intimacy or physical closeness within a relationship, men might look elsewhere to fill this void. Whether it’s due to a lack of communication, physical absence, or a decrease in affection, this disconnection can drive them toward someone who offers the connection they’re missing.

7. Coping mechanisms

Affairs can also serve as a means for men to deal with personal or professional stress, emotional turmoil, or life transitions. 

These different types of affairs might not only be about seeking pleasure but also about finding a distraction or solace from difficulties they are facing in other areas of their lives.

What percentage of married men have affairs?

So, how common are affairs? Statistics on infidelity vary widely, with some studies suggesting that about 20% to 25% of married men in the United States have engaged in extramarital sex at least once during their marriage, answering your question, “How many people have affairs?” 

Based on data from the recent General Social Survey, the likelihood of men cheating is higher compared to women. The survey found that 20% of men and 13% of women reported engaging in extramarital sexual relationships while married.

However, these figures should be approached with caution, as they rely on self-reporting, and the definition of “affair” can vary among individuals.

3 types of men most likely to have affairs

Infidelity is a complex issue that stems from various factors, personal motivations, and circumstances. While it’s crucial to note that not all men will cheat, certain patterns and behaviors can make some more inclined towards infidelity. 

Below are 3 types of men most likely to have affairs statistically, understanding that these categories do not encapsulate all scenarios but highlight common trends observed in studies and relationship counseling.

1. Men with high levels of narcissism and entitlement

Individuals who exhibit high levels of narcissism and a strong sense of entitlement may be more prone to having affairs. These personality traits can lead to a lack of empathy for their partner’s feelings and a greater likelihood of seeking gratification outside their primary relationship.

Narcissistic men often require constant admiration and validation, which they might not feel they’re receiving from their current partner. This quest for endless affirmation can drive them to seek attention from new romantic interests, viewing their actions as justified by their perceived superior needs or desires.

2. Men with a history of infidelity or who come from a background where infidelity was normalized 

Those who have previously engaged in affairs or have grown up in environments where infidelity was common may be more likely to cheat. This behavior pattern suggests a learned component to infidelity, where individuals become accustomed to seeing affairs as a typical or inevitable part of relationships.

The normalization of such behavior can diminish the perceived moral or emotional consequences of cheating, making it a more likely course of action when faced with relationship dissatisfaction or personal temptation.

3. Men experiencing significant relationship dissatisfaction or unresolved personal issues 

Individuals who are deeply unhappy in their current relationship or are dealing with unresolved personal issues, such as identity crises, mid-life crises, or significant life stressors, might be more inclined to have affairs. 

These are the types of men most likely to have affairs, as they might view an affair as an escape route or a temporary solution to their unhappiness or personal turmoil. 

The affair provides a distraction, a sense of excitement, or a way to avoid confronting the deeper issues plaguing their relationship or personal life. It’s a misguided attempt to find happiness or fulfillment outside the bounds of their primary commitment, often without fully considering the long-term consequences.

7 signs you should not miss when your partner is having an affair

Recognizing the signs of infidelity in a relationship can be challenging, as trust and denial often cloud our judgment. However, certain behaviors may indicate that your partner is involved in an affair. 

Being aware of these signs can help you address the situation more directly and understand the underlying issues, including “What does a married man want in an affair?” Here are 7 signs that should not be overlooked if you suspect your partner might be cheating.

1. Sudden changes in communication patterns

If your partner who once shared details about their day now becomes vague or avoids conversation, it might be a sign they are withholding information. This shift could indicate they are spending their emotional and conversational energy elsewhere, possibly with someone else.

2. Unexplained absences or changes in schedule

Frequent late nights at work, unexpected business trips, or sudden changes in routine without a plausible explanation can be red flags. These absences may be cover-ups for time spent with another person.

3. Increased secrecy around their phone or computer

If your partner starts to guard their phone closely, changes their passwords, or deletes their browsing history regularly, it might suggest they have something to hide. This behavior often indicates they’re communicating with someone they don’t want you to know about.

4. Unaccounted for expenses

Discovering receipts for dinners, hotels, or gifts that were not for you or noticing unexplained charges on credit card statements can be a sign of an affair. These expenses may be a way of financing the secret relationship.

5. A sudden interest in appearance

If your partner suddenly becomes more concerned about their looks, starts working out more, buys new clothes, or changes their grooming habits without a clear reason, they may be trying to impress someone else. 

It can be particularly telling if this effort is not intended for you to notice or appreciate.

Watch this TED Talk where Lucy Beresford, a relationship expert, answers the question of whether to stay or go after infidelity and discusses the courageous option of rebuilding the relationship:

6. Emotional distance

Feeling an emotional disconnect or noticing your partner is less interested in spending quality time together can indicate they are emotionally involved with someone else. This distance can manifest as indifference to family events, lack of interest in conversations, or reluctance to make future plans together.

7. Defensive behavior when questioned about their activities

If your partner reacts defensively, gets angry, or evades questions about their whereabouts or behavior, it may be a sign of guilt. This defensiveness can stem from their fear of being caught or the stress of leading a double life.

FAQs

When it comes to understanding the complexities of relationships, questions surrounding infidelity can arise, sparking curiosity and concern. Below, we address some frequently asked questions about this sensitive topic:

• Can a man cheat and still love his wife?

Yes, a man can cheat and still love his wife. Cheating often stems from unmet needs, a desire for validation, or emotional disconnection rather than a lack of love. 

It’s a misguided attempt to fulfill a void without wanting to leave their partner, highlighting personal and emotional fulfillment complexities within relationships.

• Which men are more likely to cheat?

Men with high levels of narcissism, those experiencing significant relationship dissatisfaction, and individuals with a history of infidelity are more likely to cheat. 

These factors contribute to a higher propensity for seeking fulfillment outside their primary relationship, driven by a combination of ego, unmet needs, and learned behaviors.

• What drives men to have affairs?

Men are driven to have affairs by a variety of factors, including emotional disconnection, sexual dissatisfaction, and the thrill of novelty. The pursuit of an affair often reflects deeper issues within the individual or the relationship, such as a desire for validation, escape from routine, or unresolved personal conflicts.

• How common are affairs in modern society?

Affairs are relatively common in modern society, with studies indicating varying rates of infidelity. Estimates suggest that about 20% to 25% of married men in the United States have engaged in extramarital sex at some point. 

The prevalence of affairs underscores the complexity of human relationships and the challenges in maintaining monogamy.

• Are there cultural differences in attitudes toward infidelity?

Yes, there are significant cultural differences in attitudes toward infidelity. Some cultures view affairs more leniently, considering them a natural part of human behavior, while others hold strict views against infidelity, heavily stigmatizing such actions. 

These attitudes are shaped by religious beliefs, societal norms, and historical contexts, influencing how infidelity is perceived and dealt with across different societies.

To sum up

While the reasons behind why men have affairs are varied and complex, understanding these motivations, recognizing the types of men most likely to have affairs, and being aware of the signs can provide some insight into this challenging aspect of human relationships. 

It’s essential for couples to communicate openly and honestly, addressing issues as they arise, to maintain the health and fidelity of their relationship.