22 Signs of a Catfish in a Relationships and How to Deal
Did you know that over 20,000 online romance scams were reported in the past year, resulting in losses exceeding $300 million?
This crime is rapidly increasing. In 2016, the U.S. Federal Trade Commission recorded 11,235 complaints about dating and romance scams, soaring to 52,593 by 2020.
This staggering statistic highlights just how prevalent emotional catfishing has become, leaving countless victims heartbroken and betrayed.
Catfishing isn’t limited to fake profiles—it includes manipulation, deception, and preying on emotions.
Imagine pouring your heart into someone, only to realize they’re not who they claim to be. The charming texts, the endless excuses for avoiding video calls, the vague answers about their life—could these be signs you’re being catfished?
How do you differentiate between a genuine connection and a carefully crafted lie? What steps should you take if you suspect emotional catfishing?
Take a moment, breathe, and don’t panic.
This article will guide you through the 22 signs of a catfish and provide actionable advice on how to deal with the situation immediately. Let’s ensure you protect your heart and your digital presence while navigating the tricky waters of modern relationships.
What is catfishing?
Catfishing is simply the process of luring someone into a relationship by using a fictional online persona to troll or harass the victim, scam the victim, or steal their identity.
When you catfish someone, you get the person to fall for you by presenting them with fake narratives, pictures, and videos that aren’t yours.
Before you ask if this is even possible, the available stats prove that catfishing on the internet is becoming more common.
When you do the maths, you will discover that the average victim of catfishing and romance scams lost about $2400 per scheme.
Usually, a catfish relationship aims to scam the victim out of their money or inflict pain on them somehow.
Why do people catfish?
People catfish on the internet for many different reasons. The most common is scamming others of their hard-earned money. Online romance scams are perpetrated mainly by people in search of quick money.
Another reason people end up catfishing on social media is desperation or a lack of confidence. When they don’t believe in themselves and think that they won’t be able to find love, they may be tempted to falsify their online details to attract the person they want.
Before they can even tell what’s going on, they have become full-blown catfish.
Also, people get into catfishing because of depression or anxiety. When someone falls into the deep pit of depression and anxiety spells, they may start seeking an exit route.
Along the way, some may seek to experiment online by taking up a new identity and fooling around on the internet. Hence, they pick up a persona they would have preferred to have offline.
Like every other thing we have discussed here, they get so deep in the act of catfishing even before they can tell what is going on. At this time, it becomes almost impossible for them to reveal their true identities.
22 expert signs that you have been catfished
Unsure if your online romance is real or a carefully crafted illusion? These 15 signs you’ve been catfished will help you uncover the truth.
1. The catfish never wants to video chat
Is there a better way to get to know someone and see them in real-time than video chats? If your online ‘other half’ always looks for the flimsiest excuses to opt-out every time you ask for a video chat, that may be a sign of a catfish.
2. Meeting up is an absolute no-no
When you are in the middle of a catfishing experience, they will never agree to a physical meeting, no matter how hard you try.
Even if you are in their area and you’d like to meet up for a quick chat, they would instead give you an excuse than meet you one-on-one.
3. Things are going way too fast
Because their plans are usually time-tagged, it is pretty common for a catfish to come on strong to you. Their idea of a relationship is to obtain anything they can, so they would do anything to take advantage of you before you even know what’s going on.
Take a moment to breathe and think about that relationship. Does it feel like things are a bit too rushed? What if that is one of the signs of a catfish in your life?
4. Their social media handles are shady
Social media has quickly become home to billions of people. With over 2.19 and 1.47 billion monthly users of Facebook and Instagram, respectively, these social media platforms have become the online extension of many.
One of the signs of a catfish is that they either don’t have personalized social media handles (contain their details like pictures and snippets of their lives), or they don’t even have social media handles at all.
If you are dealing with someone and feel like their social media handles don’t give a significant amount of information about them, you may want to be extremely careful.
5. They seize every opportunity to request financial help
On day 1, they need to pay this bill. The day after, they would have a sick sibling needing medical treatment.
Before you get out of that one, they tell you that they have to bail a parent from police custody. Every day, they always have a way of asking you to give them money.
One of the signs of a catfish is that they always want to be given and not to give back.
6. You notice gaps in their stories
One way to know when you are in a catfish situation is by looking at the details of the other person’s stories. When you catch them in their unguarded moments, they may give you details different from what you have always known.
Also, their inability to corroborate their stories can leave you wondering how strange things can get.
Watch this video by Pamela Meyer, author of “Liespotting,” to understand how to spot a liar:
7. The information on social media is different from real life
A quick look at their social media handle may reveal that they have incorrect details up there. Everything from where they live, their job, and where they are studying may not be accurate information.
You may discover this the more you talk to them. They may slip up and give you their accurate information at some points. It is up to you not to take these as common mistakes but to place your feet on the brakes and do your research.
8. Your friends suspect something
One of the first signs of a catfish is if your friends tell you so. You should know that one friend whose premonitions are almost always accurate all your life. What do they have to say about this mystery online lover?
9. They find it difficult to talk on the phone with you
This would even be worse if they have sent you supposed videos of themselves in the past. One of the characteristics of catfishers is that they will permanently hide behind their keypad and refuse to talk to you on the phone because they sound different from the videos they have sent before.
And they know that if they dare speak to you on the phone, you’ll put two and two together and discover who they are.
So, they would rather spend their lives coming up with clever excuses every day.
10. They are good looking, almost to a fault
This doesn’t mean that you are not deserving of some eye candy in your life. However, if someone is that good-looking, why do they always have a reason why they can’t show you their faces on a video call or meet up in real-time?
That’s some food for thought there.
11. Do they even interact with real humans on social media?
If they have given you their usernames on social media, take some time to go through their handles and see if they even interact with real humans on social media.
Do they take photos with other people (no matter how rare)? Do they even tag their friends online and have some good-mannered fun on social media? Or are they always by themselves?
If they are perpetually alone online, it could be one of the signs of a catfish.
12. You have your suspicions
As a rational adult with a super-functional brain, you have probably suspected that there’s something “off” about them. One of the easiest ways to know that you are being catfished is to look inwards.
Your mind has probably warned you that something is off, right?
13. They mostly talk about wealth
this may not add up to you because they have a way of coming back to ask you for money at the oddest times.
Whenever you converse with a catfisher, they mostly talk about having a lot of money or being from a wealthy family. Sometimes, their claims sound too good to be true. And if you look deeply, you will see that their claims are.
14. They love to bomb you from the start
When dealing with a catfisher, you may even think that they are your soulmate, the one you have looked for since the beginning of time. They speak your love language, know all the right things to say to get you weak in the knees, and are incredibly romantic.
If someone presses you to commit even without seeing them, you may want to reconsider.
15. They may press for implicating content
If a catfish is in your life to get money out of you, they may try to press you for implicating content. When conversing with them, they may ask you to send nude and erotic pictures and videos of yourself – just for fun.
Please desist from doing this. History has shown that compromising pictures and videos like these are a treasure in the hands of a catfisher. They can use them to blackmail you into giving them money over a long time.
16. They rush emotional connection or romantic commitment
Catfish often dive headfirst into intense emotions, making declarations of love or commitment far too quickly. They might shower you with compliments, call you their soulmate within days, or talk about a future together before you’ve even truly gotten to know each other.
This tactic keeps you emotionally invested, making it harder to question their authenticity. Catfishing warning signs like this often surface in relationships that feel overwhelmingly fast-paced. Pause and ask yourself: is this connection evolving naturally, or are they rushing things to manipulate you?
17. Their social media profiles are limited or inconsistent
A classic sign of online catfishing is a social media profile that doesn’t add up. They may have only a handful of pictures, no tagged posts, or vague captions that reveal little about their life.
For instance, their profile may show one high-quality photo with no interactions or history. Limited or inconsistent social media can be one of the clearest catfishing signs to look out for.
18. They frequently claim technical issues to avoid calls
Have you noticed a pattern of dropped calls, blurry video chats, or excuses like “my camera’s broken”? This is a textbook sign you’re being catfished. Catfish often hide behind technical difficulties to avoid exposing their real identity. If their excuses feel endless, trust your gut—something’s off.
19. There’s always an excuse for missing events
From last-minute emergencies to “unforeseen travel,” catfish will consistently avoid meeting in person. For example, they might cancel plans with elaborate stories like being stuck at work or having a family crisis. Recognizing such patterns is key to how to spot a catfish.
20. They exhibit possessive or controlling behavior
A catfish might try to dominate your time, discourage you from speaking to others, or demand constant updates about your life. This is a manipulative tactic designed to maintain control over the narrative. Such behavior is a glaring sign you’re being catfished and should not be ignored.
21. They refuse to share personal details or proof of identity
When asked for basic details—like their workplace, hometown, or even a candid photo—they dodge the question or provide vague answers. If someone you’re speaking to consistently avoids proving who they are, it’s one of the most telling catfishing warning signs.
22. You receive strange messages or warnings from others
Another alarming indicator is unsolicited messages from strangers warning you about the person. For instance, someone might say, “I’ve been scammed by them before,” or you might stumble upon comments online linking them to other cases. These are undeniable catfishing signs to take seriously and investigate further.
What to do if you suspect you’re being catfished
If you suspect you’re being catfished, act swiftly to protect yourself. Stop sharing personal information immediately and avoid sending money.
Verify their identity by asking for live video calls or specific photos. Conduct a reverse image search of their profile pictures to check for duplicates online. Trust your instincts if something feels off.
Report the account to the platform they’re using and block them. For additional help, reach out to trusted organizations like Cyber Civil Rights Initiative or report fraud to the Federal Trade Commission (FTC). Taking quick action is crucial to prevent further deception or harm.
What not to do when you have been catfished?
It’s easy to feel embarrassed, betrayed, or even furious, but how you respond is crucial. Reacting impulsively or making rash decisions can make the situation worse.
While it’s natural to want answers or confront the person, there are certain steps you should avoid at all costs. Knowing what not to do can help you regain control and move forward with clarity and confidence.
Here are essential actions to avoid when dealing with catfishing:
- Don’t engage in heated confrontations. It’s tempting to call them out or seek an explanation, but confronting a catfish directly often leads nowhere. They may deny, deflect, or manipulate further, causing more stress.
- Don’t share more personal details. Even if they try to explain or apologize, don’t let your guard down. Avoid sharing additional information like your address, workplace, or financial details—they’ve already exploited your trust.
- Don’t blame yourself. It’s easy to spiral into self-doubt or guilt, but remember, catfish prey on vulnerabilities. This is about their deceit, not your intelligence.
- Don’t let fear stop you from reporting. Failing to report the catfish allows them to continue their behavior. File a report with the platform or authorities to protect others.
- Don’t ignore emotional recovery. Being catfished takes a toll emotionally. Avoid isolating yourself or suppressing feelings. Seek support from friends, family, or professionals to heal.
How to save yourself from being catfished?
Protecting yourself starts with awareness and caution. By recognizing red flags and practicing mindful interactions, you can avoid falling into a catfish’s trap. Here’s how to safeguard yourself:
1. Do a reverse image search
Use platforms like Google Reverse Image Search or TinEye to verify if their profile pictures are authentic. A common tactic of catfishers is to use stolen or stock images. If their photo appears on multiple unrelated profiles, it’s a major warning sign.
2. Don’t send sensitive photos
Catfishers may request private pictures to manipulate or blackmail you later. Always think twice before sending anything online—you never know how it may be used.
3. Never give money to internet strangers
One of the clearest red flags is a request for money. No matter how convincing their story sounds—be it for emergencies or life crises—avoid sending money. Genuine people don’t seek financial help from online acquaintances.
4. Set boundaries and limit contact
Be cautious about how much time you spend interacting with someone online. If they seem overly interested or invasive, trust your instincts and reduce communication.
5. Don’t send photos of yourself
Aside from sensitive images, avoid sending even casual selfies. Catfishers might misuse your pictures to create fake profiles or manipulate others.
6. Avoid engaging with their requests
If they persistently ask for favors or try to guilt-trip you, disengage. Their demands are often strategies to gain leverage over you.
7. Consult a professional
If you suspect catfishing but aren’t sure, reach out to a professional or report them to the platform. Professionals can guide you on how to navigate the situation safely.
How to end a catfish relationship?
Knowing how to end a catfish relationship is an important skill you must have in today’s world, seeing as there are many chances of encountering a catfisher in your lifetime.
Well, here are some things to try out.
How to end a catfish relationship | Details |
---|---|
1. Remind yourself that you are the victim | It’s normal to feel pity for the catfisher, but don’t let this cloud your judgment. Constantly remind yourself that you were deceived and manipulated. This mindset is crucial to empower yourself to take the necessary steps to end the relationship. |
2. Block them | Immediately block the catfisher on all social media platforms and messaging apps. Also, block any mutual "friends" you met through them to prevent further contact or potential manipulation. Secure your online presence by changing passwords and privacy settings. |
3. Seek justice, especially if they did damage to you | If the catfisher defrauded you of money, stole your identity, or caused emotional harm, consider reporting them to authorities or filing a formal complaint. While this step is personal, it can help hold them accountable. |
4. Just leave | The most important step is to walk away. Continuing to engage only prolongs the toxic relationship. Prioritize your mental and emotional well-being by cutting ties entirely, even if it feels challenging at first. |
Break free
Catfishing can leave deep scars, but it doesn’t define your worth or future. Ending such a relationship is your first step toward healing and empowerment.
By taking control of your digital presence and emotional boundaries, you’re not just protecting yourself—you’re setting a precedent for how you deserve to be treated.
The online world can be a tricky space, but with the right awareness, you can navigate it safely. Learn to trust your instincts and always prioritize your well-being over fleeting connections. If you’ve been catfished, don’t let shame or regret hold you back—turn this experience into a lesson in resilience.
Ready to take control?
Educate yourself and spread awareness so others don’t fall into the same trap. Remember, the power lies in your hands to create meaningful and safe relationships, both online and offline. Keep moving forward—you’ve got this!
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