13 Ways to Make an One-Sided Open Relationships Work

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The basic idea of an open relationship is that two partners decide to see other people while maintaining the relationship. This means that they would both prioritize each other over anyone. However, they are free to see anyone they want.

When one person wants an open relationship and the other does not, this is called a one-sided open relationship. This article will teach you what a one-sided open relationship means and how to make it work.

What are one-sided open relationships?

A one-sided open relationship is a union where one partner is free to date others while the other does not. This type of relationship can be challenging to navigate because it needs a lot of understanding.

In a one-sided open relationship, the partner seeing other people needs to be more detailed when communicating with their primary partner. Additionally, they must keep reassuring their primary partner that they are still the utmost priority.

To illustrate one-sided open relationship examples, let’s consider the following scenarios:

• “Sarah and John have an open relationship where Sarah can explore romantic connections outside their partnership, but John remains monogamous.”
• “Alex allows their partner, Taylor, to date other people, while Alex chooses to focus solely on their relationship with Taylor.”

If the monogamous couple isn’t comfortable with a one-sided open union, it might not work because balancing one-sided expectations might be challenging when one party isn’t in agreement.

The examples of one-sided open relationships are a few common ones where the dynamics between the two partners reflect the complexities of non-monogamous partnerships. In such cases, the partner who remains monogamous might feel that the relationship feels one-sided.

How does a one-sided open relationship differ from a traditional open relationship?

A one-sided open relationship also called an “asymmetric open relationship,” differs from a traditional open relationship in that only one partner is permitted to engage in romantic or sexual activities with others outside the relationship, while the other partner remains monogamous. 

The asymmetry is negotiated through open communication, and the rules and boundaries are typically skewed in favor of the partner who desires non-monogamy. The reasons for one-sided openness can vary, such as a desire for variety, differences in sexual desire, or other factors.

LMHC Kimberly Smith highlights,

However, this arrangement can be emotionally challenging for the monogamous partner, leading to feelings of jealousy and insecurity. Successful one-sided open relationships require open and honest communication, clear boundaries, and regular reevaluation to ensure both partners’ needs are met while navigating the complexities of asymmetry and potential emotional challenges.

So, knowing the answer to how one-sided open relationships are different from traditional open relationships “, What is a one-sided open relationship called?” and “What is an open relationship?” let’s further explore how you can make this relationship successful and what rules you must keep in mind.

What makes a successful open relationship?

If you have ever asked questions like do open marriages and half-open relationships work, the answer can be both yes or no. One fundamental truth to understand is that an open relationship or marriage can only be successful if all the partners abide by the set rules and practices.

Additionally, the partners involved need to keep up with communication because it could help them to clearly understand one another’s needs and make room for improvement. The same also applies to a one-way open relationship. 

Both partners need to come to a clear understanding of their needs and stick to the protocols in the relationship. To understand more about building a solid and successful open relationship, check this book by Kate Loree titled Open Deeply. This book teaches how to build compassionate and open relationships.

7 rules to have a one-sided open relationship

An open relationship typically involves consensual non-monogamy, where partners agree to have romantic or sexual connections with others while maintaining their primary relationship. However, it’s important to note that open relationships should be built on trust, communication, and consent from all parties involved. 

Trying to have a one-sided open relationship, where only one partner can pursue outside connections, can be challenging and potentially problematic. 

It’s crucial to navigate such dynamics carefully and sensitively to everyone’s feelings and boundaries. If you’re interested in exploring this kind of arrangement, here are some one-sided open relationship rules to consider:

• Open and honest communication: Communicate openly with your partner about your desires, feelings, and boundaries. Be honest about why you want a one-sided open relationship and what you hope to gain from it.
• Mutual consent: Both partners should agree to the arrangement willingly and without pressure. Ensure that your partner is comfortable and consents to the idea. Respect their feelings and boundaries.

• Clear boundaries: Establish clear and well-defined boundaries that both partners are comfortable with. Discuss what is allowed and off-limits regarding outside connections, intimacy, and emotional involvement. It’s also important for the third parties to agree to the boundaries.
• Regular check-ins: Maintain open lines of communication with your partner throughout the process. Regularly check in to see how you feel, address any concerns or insecurities, and adjust the arrangement as necessary.
• Safe sex and health: Prioritize safe sex practices and regular health check-ups to protect yourself and your partner from sexually transmitted infections (STIs). The CDC recommends getting tested for STIs every 3-6 months. 
• Discretion and privacy: Maintain discretion and respect each other’s privacy. Be discreet about your outside connections and avoid sharing intimate details about those relationships with your partner unless they want to know.
• Emotional support: Recognize that emotions may arise in any non-monogamous relationship. Be prepared to provide emotional support for each other and consider seeking guidance from a therapist or counselor if needed.

Remember that one-sided open relationships can be challenging and not work for everyone. It’s crucial to prioritize all parties’ emotional well-being and consent.

If at any point your partner becomes uncomfortable or the arrangement is causing harm to the relationship, be willing to reevaluate and potentially reconsider the open relationship or seek professional guidance to navigate the situation effectively.

13 tips for making a one-sided open relationship work

Open relationships can only work when some measures are in place to ensure it goes smoothly. If some of these tips are ignored, both partners might find it challenging to provide balance in the relationship. Here are some ways to make a one-sided open relationship work:

1. Understand what open relationships mean

If you want to learn how to have an open relationship, it is essential to do your research. This is because entering a relationship you don’t understand can be challenging. 

Hence, if it is a one-sided, open relationship, you can try to learn how they work and explain it to your partner. Similarly, if it is what you and your partner want, you should take ample time to delve deeper into this subject. 

It can help you avoid mistakes that can ruin the relationship. Additionally, you can reach out to people who have done it before for a practical idea of how to get started.

2. Make communication a priority

Even if you have a one-sided, open relationship, you must ensure that you and your partner have open and honest conversations. If you don’t have clear communication, it can affect the relationship. 

You need to know what is going on with your partner and vice-versa. It is also essential for partners to know how each other is feeling so that they can make the necessary corrections.

3. Set boundaries in the open-relationship

When you understand how a one-sided open relationship or an open union works, it is advisable to set some ground rules to ensure its success. If there are no boundaries, some unavoidable conflicts can emerge. 

For instance, you can tell your partner what you are sensitive to so they won’t unintentionally rub it in your face.

Even though your partner does not perfectly show understanding when sticking to these boundaries, it can help to know that they know that there are lines that shouldn’t be crossed in the relationship.

4. Consult a therapist before starting

If you begin a one-sided or mutually open relationship, seeing a therapist before proceeding can be essential. This is especially helpful when transitioning from a closed relationship to a whole one.

The whole process can be too overwhelming for you and your partner at some point. Hence, you might need a professional to help calm your nerves and reduce your fears. When you see a therapist, you can learn how to set one-sided open relationship rules, understand conflicts, communicate properly, etc.

Kimberly Smith adds,

5. Mingle with other couples in open relationships

One of the ways to build a solid support system in a one-sided open relationship or just the open one is to find other couples doing the same thing. When you find couples in open relationships, you may not feel alone.

You can learn a lot from watching how other people handle similar issues. Additionally, you can also reach out to these couples for pieces of advice. This might be helpful because they can give you pragmatic steps to solve any relationship issue.

6. Don’t bury negative emotions

If you feel wrong about something in a one-sided open marriage, it is best to dispel it instead of burying it. It would be best if you spoke to your partner about whatever worries you so that a solution can be found.

For instance, if you are feeling jealous, communicate this to your partner so they can provide you with the needed assurance.

You must understand that no relationship is perfect, and keeping those negative emotions can become unhealthy in the long run. When you don’t keep negative emotions, it can strengthen the bond with your partner.

7. Decide on the duration of the open relationship

When it comes to a one-sided open relationship or the customary open union, they are usually temporary, even though they might last for some years. Therefore, you and your partner must decide when the relationship will become closed or if you want the open status to remain permanent.

When this is decided, you should have a plan for how the relationship will end. Also, you may have to get ready to create more boundaries and rules because your relationship is returning to its former status.

8. Don’t deplete the romance in your relationship

One of the mistakes that some couples make when they want to make their relationship open is they forget to attend to the emotional needs of their primary partner. Remember that the bond between you and your primary partner is unique and should be preserved.

Therefore, while you attend to the emotional desires of other individuals in the open relationship, ensure your partner is not left out. You can organize dates or hangouts from time to time. This is to show that they are still special to you.

9. Set safety guidelines

In a one-sided or mutually open relationship, you or your partner might be having sex with other individuals. Hence, both of you need to set some guidelines to ensure your safety because you still need to attend to the sensual needs of your primary partner.

You need to understand that the inclusion of third parties in your relationship increases the chances of contracting some sexually transmitted diseases. Also, remember that those third parties also have people they are sleeping with. Therefore, put measures in place to prevent STIs and prevent unplanned pregnancies.

10. Be ready for the unexpected

One of the open marriage rules you should never forget is to avoid getting your hopes up. If you do this, you might get hurt in the process. Your expectations of an open relationship might not play out how you want, and you must accept this possibility.

Therefore, you need to keep an open mind so you won’t get too disappointed. For instance, your partner might not stick to some rules discussed before the open relationship starts. Hence, it is essential to communicate with your partner to resolve some issues.

To get a broader grasp of open relationships, check out Axel Neustadter’s book, Open Love, as it acts as a complete guide to open relationships and other concepts.

11. Self-reflection and emotional awareness

Before exploring a one-sided open relationship, it’s crucial for both partners to engage in self-reflection and develop emotional awareness. Understand your motivations and insecurities, and encourage your partner to do the same.

Being in touch with your emotions and recognizing potential triggers can help you navigate the challenges that may arise with greater empathy and understanding.

Watch Lisa A. Romano, a life coach, as she explains how emotional intelligence can enhance your relationship:

12. Regular relationship check-ins

Schedule regular check-ins with your partner to maintain a healthy, one-sided, open relationship. These discussions should be open, honest, and non-judgmental. 

Use this time to share your feelings, assess how the open relationship impacts both of you, and make any necessary adjustments to boundaries or rules. Keeping the lines of communication open is essential to address concerns as they arise and ensure everyone’s needs are being met.

13. Mutual respect and consent

While one partner may be more actively involved in exploring other relationships, it’s crucial to maintain mutual respect and consent within the primary relationship. 

Both partners should be free to express their desires, set boundaries, and say “no” to any aspect of the open relationship without fear of judgment or reprisal. Respecting each other’s autonomy and consent is fundamental to building trust and preserving the primary relationship’s strength.

Commonly asked questions

When it comes to a one-sided open relationship, there can be many questions you may need answers to. In the following section, we have answered some common regarding having such relationships.

• Is communication important in a one-sided open relationship?

Communication is crucial in a one-sided open relationship, allowing partners to express their feelings, fears, and desires openly. It can help understand each other’s needs and ensure consent and comfort.

• How do you establish boundaries in a one-sided open relationship?

To establish boundaries in a one-sided open relationship, have an honest conversation about expectations, limits, and deal-breakers. Defining what’s acceptable and what’s not is essential to avoid misunderstandings.

• Why do some couples choose a one-sided open relationship?

Some couples opt for a one-sided open relationship to explore desires outside the primary partnership while maintaining emotional commitment and security. It can add variety and excitement to their relationship.

• How can jealousy be managed in a one-sided, open relationship?

Jealousy in a one-sided open relationship can be managed through open dialogue, reassurance, and practicing self-awareness. Addressing insecurities and building trust is key to handling jealousy constructively.