How to Be Playful in a Relationship: 20 Effective Tips

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“Marriage is a friendship set to music,” as the saying goes, and that sense of friendship is often what keeps the spark alive. 

One of the best ways to nurture that bond is by adding playfulness. 

Laughter, light-hearted moments, and spontaneous fun remind both partners that a relationship isn’t just about responsibilities; it’s also about joy.

But when life gets busy or routines settle in, have you ever wondered how to be playful in a relationship without forcing it? Do you miss the days when laughter flowed more easily between you and your partner?

Playfulness reduces stress, strengthens the bond, and helps partners face challenges with more resilience.

LMHC Kimberly Smith states,

Playfulness in a relationship helps strengthen intimacy, make rough times easier to get through together, and keeps the relationship interesting, especially long-term relationships that can fall victim to becoming mudane.

If you’re looking for ways to bring more joy into your relationship, this article offers 20 effective tips to reignite playfulness in a relationship and keep the connection alive.

What does being playful in a relationship mean?

So, firstly, what does playful mean in a relationship?

Playfulness in a relationship means you and your spouse know how to joke around and have fun. It’s also a form of flirtation.

Flirting naturally makes your spouse feel good about themselves. Playful flirtation makes others feel special and desired. It can also open the lines of communication, which research shows lead to happier and more positive relationships.

Being playful in a relationship means embracing fun, laughter, and spontaneity with your partner. It’s about keeping things lighthearted, teasing, and enjoying each other’s company without pressure. 

If you’re wondering how to be playful in a relationship, it’s all about building moments that make you feel like a playful couple—connected and carefree.

Why bother being playful?

Why bother being playful in your relationship? Well, playfulness isn’t just about fun—it’s a secret ingredient that keeps relationships fresh, connected, and full of life. Learning how to be playful in a relationship can make a world of difference.

Here’s how it helps:

• Knowing how to be playful in a relationship adds spontaneity and excitement, helping you escape the monotony.
• Playful moments make you feel closer, reminding you why you fell in love in the first place.
• Laughter is a natural stress reliever, and learning how to be playful in a relationship brings joy into even tough times.

What can playfulness do for your relationship?

Playfulness is more than just having fun—it’s the secret sauce that adds warmth, connection, and joy to your relationship. But what can it really do for you and your partner?

• Can reignite the heartstrings

Knowing how to be playful in a relationship helps deepen emotional intimacy. Those light-hearted moments make you feel more connected, allowing you to see the joy in your bond and draw closer, especially when life gets heavy.

• Can turn stress into smiles

In difficult times, playfulness acts like a pressure release valve. A shared laugh or goofy moment can cut through tension, transforming stressful situations into lighter ones and helping you both cope together.

• Can spark the magic again

Long-term relationships can sometimes feel routine, but playfulness brings that spark back. Whether through playful teasing, random adventures, or sweet surprises, staying playful keeps the romance fresh and exciting, no matter how long you’ve been together.

How to be playful in a relationship?

The type of play you like depends on your hobbies and personality.

If you like games, then couples’ sports or board games may be the way you let out your silly side. 

If you love wit and banter, flirtation and joking around might be more your speed.

Be careful not to cross any boundaries when learning how to be more playful in a relationship. You would never want to do anything to hurt or embarrass them in the name of fun.

Stick to play that you can both enjoy.

What are the examples of playfulness in relationships?

Playfulness in relationships can be simple yet impactful. 

Picture this: you and your partner have an inside joke that always makes you both laugh, bringing you closer every time. 

Or maybe you surprise them with a spontaneous dance-off in the living room after dinner, adding light-hearted fun to your evening. 

Even playful teasing, like challenging each other in a friendly game, keeps the energy fun and exciting. If you’re wondering how to have fun in a relationship, these little moments of joy and connection can make all the difference in keeping things fresh and engaging.

20 great tips to be more playful with your partner

If you want a more playful relationship, you’ve come to the right place. Here are 20 tips on how to bring levity and laughter into your relationship.

1. Be flirty

The first tip for how to be playful in a relationship is to flirt with your spouse. 

A simple hand on the leg during dinner, a quick, suggestive raise of the eyebrow somewhere in public, or some flirty text messages will go a long way toward bringing a playful aspect to your relationship.

2. Cultivate a positive attitude

People respond well to positivity. If your partner feels you are too serious, it may be time to adjust your attitude. Show them your softer, sillier side, and invite them to join you by showing a positive, willing attitude.

3. Have a tickle fight

If your spouse likes being tickled, go wild! Have a tickle fight at home and let your laughter do the talking. Not only is it fun, but research shows that laughter boosts relationship satisfaction and is an important part of social bonding.

Show your spouse you’re not afraid of getting silly by inviting them to a tickle match.

4. Sing songs

If you want a more playful relationship, now is the time to banish your bashfulness and belt out your favorite songs together.

Play air guitar in the car, sing some childhood classics from musical movies you liked as a kid, or have a lip-sync battle.

Singing is a great way to let loose and have some fun with your partner.

5. Make silly videos

One tip for how to keep a relationship playful is to make silly videos together.

• Do a social media trend dance together
• Do a travel vlog during your next overseas adventure
• Do a reaction video (the two of you reacting to a new album you’re both excited about or trying new, wild foods together)

These videos are a creative and fun way to display teamwork while bringing some light and levity to your relationship.

6. Leave love notes around the house

Another adorable tip for how to be playful in a relationship is to leave love notes around the house.

There is no better feeling than making your partner smile. Start by putting a sticky note on the bathroom mirror that says, “Just wanted to say I love you!” on it.

Get creative about where you put the notes. Some ideas are:

• On the car steering wheel
• In their lunch pail
• In the dresser drawer
• In their purse

And don’t be afraid to get silly when you write out the notes. “I love you more than ice cream cake!” or “I’d walk 100 miles for you with no shoes on!” are guaranteed to make your partner giggle.

7. Smile more often

If you’re not sure how to be more playful, start with a smile.

Smiling is a way to show warmth and bring levity to a conversation. It invites your partner to share positive emotions with you.

Plus, when you smile (even if it’s a forced smile), your brain produces serotonin, which creates a flood of mood-elevating endorphins. This lowers your blood pressure, reduces stress, and boosts your immune system – all from one smile!

8. Make characters

A great way to become a more playful couple is to make up characters.

Think of this like roleplay, only it’s outside the bedroom. He can be a funny fisherman, and you can be a mad scientist who has come to trick him and steal all of his fish.

Be as silly and creative as you want. These characters will no doubt make recurring appearances in your relationship as they become one of your new favorite inside jokes.

9. Tell jokes

If you want to learn how to be more playful in a relationship, try making your partner laugh.

Another study published in Sage Journals found that couples who value laughter are more likely to stay together.

Learn more about the importance of humor in the relationship with this video:

10. Do a game night

One easy tip for how to be playful in a relationship is to have a game night.

Grab a couple of snacks, a few drinks, and a handful of your favorite party games. Play like you are kids again and spend the entire evening competing to pass GO.

11. Make a playdate

Another fun tip for how to be playful in a relationship is to make a playdate for adults.

These adult playdates, called “Kidult” activities, are a surefire way to bring out the playfulness in a relationship. Some fun ideas for your kidult afternoon are:

• Go to a bounce house and spend the day on the trampoline, trying to out-bounce each other
• Attend a ‘whodunnit’ mystery show
• Go swimming at the beach and pack a picnic
• Stargaze together
• Go to a corn maze and try and navigate your way out – the perfect fall activity!
• Spend a night at a museum – many cities (London, Los Angeles, New York, the list goes on!) will allow you to spend the night in a sleeping back at the museum. Imagine sleeping right next to a dinosaur skeleton!

12. Try new foods together

If you’re for how to be more playful, look no further than your dinner plate. 

This challenge can be as mild as trying a restaurant in town and ordering something out of the ordinary for you to order something new and wild online, like cricket chips or candy from another country.

13. Have a costume party for two

Plan a fancy night in with dinner and wine by the fire, but dress up like your favorite characters while you do. You’ll be hard-pressed not to giggle your way through dinner.

14. Make a movie night to remember

Movie night is a classic date, but this time put a childhood twist on it.

Have the sleepover you’ve only ever dreamed of by making a pillow fort in the living room, buying a scandalous number of snacks, and snuggling up with your partner.

15. Daydream together

Playful relationships are fun by nature but don’t forget to connect emotionally, too.

Mix playfulness and emotional intimacy by daydreaming as a couple. Set goals and talk about your future together.

Asking something as simple as: “Where do you see yourself in 5/10 years?” can open up a world of conversation. There is also plenty of opportunity to make jokes: “I see us running away to Aspen and opening the world’s greatest pie shop!”

Your jokes will make your partner laugh, but your conversation will bring you closer than ever.

16. Recreate your first date

One suggestion on how to be more playful in your relationship is to recreate your first date.

This can either be amazingly romantic as you end up fine dining and reminiscing about how you first fell in love or be absolutely hilarious as you wind up with takeout burgers and going roller skating afterward.

17. Ask questions

An additional tip for how to be playful in a relationship is to ask your partner funny questions like:

• Have you ever peed in a pool?
• If you had a pet chipmunk, what would you name it?
• What is a ridiculous pet peeve you have?
• If you had to marry a cartoon character, who would you pick and why?

These questions will open up some hilarious conversations and keep you and your spouse in stitches for the rest of the night.

18. Play outside

Create the playful relationship you’ve always dreamed of by taking the fun outdoors. If you both love sports, have a little friendly competition on the soccer field.

There are plenty of seasonal activities (skiing, sledding, swimming, boating, football, hockey) to keep you and your partner playfully competitive all year long.

19. Create something together

Sometimes learning how to be more playful means taking a page from your childhood. When you were little, life was full of creativity.

You built with blocks, made crafts, and baked new and amazing things.

Get creative with your partner by recreating these childhood pastimes or by trying something new together, like taking a pottery class.

20. Have a dance party

The best way to create the ultimate playful relationship is to dance.

Throw on your favorite album, take your partner’s hand, and dance the night away. Not only is this a fun and spontaneous way to spend the evening, but it also has the potential to be incredibly romantic (music-dependent.)

Playing and bonding

You don’t have to be a kid to enjoy the playful side of life.

Learning how to be playful in a relationship can bring balance and levity into your love life. You can become a playful couple by smiling more often, making your partner laugh, and cultivating a positive attitude.

Enjoy the benefits of being playful in a relationship. Bringing out your inner child will increase happiness, reduce stress, and draw you closer to your partner for years to come.