37 Genuine Signs He Is Making Love to You
While you might be enjoying sex, you aren’t always making love. Can you tell the difference?
Making love goes far beyond fulfilling your or your partner’s sexual needs. It means connecting to your partner on an emotional and physical level.
One of the stark differences between having sex and making love is that making love involves love, affection, and consideration, while having sex simply means connecting to someone sexually.
LMFT, Dr, Kimberly VanBuren says
Unlike sex, making love is characterized by love, tenderness, and consideration, focusing on both the physical and emotional aspects of the experience.
Is he making love to you or just having sex?
It’s in the details that you can differentiate if you’re having sex or making love. We cover 30 signs he is making love to you.
What does making love feel like?
Both sex and lovemaking include performing sexual acts with your partner, but there is a distinct difference. While sex can also be meaningful, it might not involve forming an emotional attachment.
Making love is different. Making love is sex with a deep connection.
So, what are the signs he enjoys making love to you? Even though making love is a feeling of deep connection, there are still plenty of signs he enjoys making love to you. Lovemaking is not an isolated moment but about the whole experience.
37 signs he is making love to you
Notice all 30 signs he enjoys making love to you before, during, and after intercourse.
1. He’s relaxed
Before you get into bed together, notice the sexual chemistry between you two. Are things awkward, or do things flow smoothly?
If the conversation flows easily, this is one of the signs he is making love to you. If he is relaxed and casual yet has confident energy, chances are your man is attracted to you sexually but willing to wait.
2. Clean shirt
How did he show up?
Showing up in a clean shirt to be presentable to you is one of the greatest signs he is making love to you.
If he took the time and effort to shower and put on some sexy-smelling cologne or deodorant, these are all physical signs of love. Meaning he wants to impress you, and he’s interested in more than just sex with you.
3. There is no rush
Are you trying to understand what does making love means to a man?
For many, it is a form of seeking relief. For such men, there is no rush to get into bed. Although there are signs he enjoys you in bed, there is absolutely no pressure to get down to business. You spend time chatting and kissing.
These are signs he enjoys making love to you. You talk about your days and have a good dialogue before making it to the bedroom.
4. His pupils dilate
Our pupils (the black part inside our eyes) can tell us a lot about what someone is feeling for us.
When we experience strong emotions, our pupils tend to get bigger or dilate. This means if you notice his pupils are dilated, your man is attracted to you sexually and feeling a strong desire for you.
5. Checks in
He continues to check in during sex. He asks if the position is ok for you. He says, “Does this feel good?” continuously making sure that you’re okay and having a pleasure-filled time. He is building trust and showing he cares by making love to you.
6. He’s attentive
If he enjoys sex and making love, you’ll find that he will ask you what you like, and he listens.
When a man looks into your eyes while making love, he is actively trying to create a dialogue between the two of you for mutually enjoyable lovemaking.
He asks you what you like, and he listens. Sex vs. making love is the difference between an engaged partner and a selfish one.
7. Boundaries are respected
Your boundaries are highly regarded and respected whether you’ve communicated them before sex or during sex. If you ask him to stop, he does. Simple as that. This should be a base level for all men. A man who is making love with you would never push your boundaries.
8. Praising you
He gives lots of verbal affection. When a man and woman are making love, the man is likely to praise the whole woman, not just her body. He wants to shower you with praise that goes beyond your physical being.
His words are signs he enjoys making love to you. He wants you to feel good as a human, as a lover.
9. Eye contact
Sustained eye contact releases chemicals in our brains that foster human bonds and connections. When a man looks into your eyes while making love, this is a physical sign of love.
It shows that he enjoys sex with you and cares about sustaining a bond.
10. He doesn’t go straight for penetration
If he doesn’t go straight for penetration, it is one of the most significant signs he is making love to you.
He enjoys the process of making love with you. If a man consistently takes the time to build sexual tension, you can feel confident that he wants to make love with you. Men and women making love are willing to wait for it.
11. Aware of contraception
He is aware of contraception and health risks. He takes the initiative to bring his protection and brings it out at the right time. It’s a sign of interest for your well-being when a man takes ownership of his contraception without having to be asked.
12. He slows down
Rough and aggressive sex is fun and pleasurable, especially when there is a lot of chemistry and passion between you two. But if he also takes the time to slow down and bring a romantic pace into the lovemaking, this is a sign he enjoys making love to you.
13. Uses your name
When a guy says he wants you sexually and uses your name, it is a sign he enjoys making love to you.
It means your name has been on their mind. He wants to say it and have you hear it. This can be a vulnerable thing for men and women alike. So, hearing your name is a very clear sign isn’t just sex. When a man wants you sexually, he will use your name.
14. The hands
Where are their hands during sex? Do they take the time to tenderly hold your head? Do they brush your hair out of your face or caress your waist with a gentle soft touch?
If they do, that means they are making a conscious effort to show you how precious and special they think you are.
15. He’s present
Making love to a woman requires a man to be fully present.
One of the key differences in lovemaking is the matter of being present. Is he fully taken by the experience? Does he glance at the clock or out the window?
He shouldn’t talk about something unrelated to the sexual experience. Making love to a woman means giving themselves fully to being present with you.
16. Tries new things
He is up for trying new things like different sex positions, locations, or toys. If a man is attracted to you sexually, he will be open to doing new things with you. It shows vulnerability and reveals that they feel safe and supported in the bedroom.
Trust is a huge factor when it comes to lovemaking.
17. Lots of kisses
In lovemaking, there are lots of kisses. We communicate so much through a kiss. Soft, sweet kisses are often reserved for people we are feeling connected with.
Kissing someone you love can feel addictively good. He enjoys making love to you if he can’t get enough of your kisses.
There is so much pleasure in kissing. Learn all about how truly amazing kissing is by watching this video:
18. Little things matter
Sometimes the details expose hidden messages during sex. Did he move a pillow out of the way because it was inconvenient for you? Does he remember the positions that were pleasurable to you? All these are the signs he enjoys with you in bed to communicate his passion and love.
19. He shows vulnerability
If he says no to a suggestion you make or states his boundaries, that means he is showing vulnerability, and that’s a great thing.
Life Coach Jaclyn Hunt highlights,
If a man considers you his best friend and trusts you with all of his physical and mental secrets, he is pouring his love out to you.
It’s harder for men to be vulnerable than women. So, if he expresses himself in a way that is scary to him, then these are signs he enjoys making love to you.
20. Mirroring
Mirroring is when we mimic someone’s actions. Notice if he is mirroring your actions.
Mimicking shows physical signs of love. If you kiss him on the neck and then he does the same to you, he is mirroring. It’s a way we build and gain trust. Men enjoying sex will often mirror the person they are to build relationship trust.
21. It’s easy to open up
If you can open up easily, ask for what you want, and moan freely, this means he is making you feel safe.
Sometimes our subconscious knows more than we do. When he enjoys sex and lovemaking, it will feel like you can open up. This is because he is pouring into you emotionally, and you feel safe to be yourself.
22. You orgasm
Men who are invested in making love make sure their partner has an earth-shattering orgasm. Maybe even more than once.
This shows that they are committed to your pleasure, not just theirs. A man who takes the time and effort to bring his woman to orgasm is invested in a deep connection.
23. Lots of laughing
During and after sex, there is lots of laughing.
Laughing is a sign to show he enjoys sex and a magical way to connect with someone. It’s a way of showing ease and having fun together. Sex is sometimes awkward, but instead of strange silence, there is laughter. This is a sure sign that you’re making love.
24. Doesn’t leave right after
After the act of lovemaking is finished, you enjoy each other’s company. He doesn’t try to get up and leave right away.
He doesn’t even look at his phone or try to put on pants. If he leans into you after sex instead of facing away, this is one of the signs he is making love to you.
Life Coach Jaclyn Hunt highlights,
Men often express their love in a very physical way. You know they are in love when they also want to be with you when sex is off the table.
25. He wants to cuddle
Long sessions of cuddling after making love are physical signs of love.
Cuddling shows he is feeling safe and secure, and comfortable with you. Men don’t create meaningful bonds without a feeling of comfort. So if he wants to cuddle after lovemaking, then he is showing you that he trusts you and feels comfortable in your arms.
26. The pillow talk
If the pillow talk is fun, easy, and endless, it’s a sign you’ve made love. Conversing and kissing and basking in each other’s sex glow is an amazing sign that you’re connecting on a deep and emotional level. It brings you both closer to each other intellectually and shows powerful chemistry.
27. He asks about it
He asks if you had a good time making love. He wants to make sure you experience pleasure, and he was a part of that. He wants to continue to learn about you sexually because he enjoys sex with you and hopes to please you in the future. If he feels comfortable asking this question, it’s a great sign.
28. Wants to go again
He enjoys making love to you if he wants to go again. This is a sign that he’s in the mood for lovemaking.
Men who just want to have sex don’t want to spend the time it takes in between rounds to connect with a woman. If the pillow talk is electric and leads to more sexual interaction, he enjoys making love to you.
29. Says the word love
He says he loves having sex with you. When a guy says he wants you sexually and uses the word love to describe a feeling or experience he has with you. He is not-so-subtly telling you, “We are making love, not just having sex.”
30. Makes plans
He makes plans to connect again. He wants to know that he will see you again, and that you two will continue to make love and foster a deeper connection.
Knowing that he is already anticipating the next time he can make love to you shows a strong connection. Making plans is one of the signs he is making love to you.
31. Compliments
He showers you with compliments during intimate moments, expressing how beautiful, desirable, and loved you are. Compliments become a way to make you feel special and valued, deepening your connection with each affectionate word.
32. Initiation of intimacy
Initiating intimacy is like sparking a flame between both of you. Whether it’s a lingering look, a gentle touch, or verbalizing his desire, it’s about communicating that he craves the profound connection you share and eagerly wants to express it physically.
Life Coach Jaclyn Hunt points out,
When you are absorbed in the moment together and are enjoying your time together in and out of bed, love is being made.
33. Variety
Variety keeps your love life exciting and vibrant. Exploring new things together, trying different ways to connect intimately, and being open to what brings both of you pleasure ensures that your love remains an ongoing adventure, always full of delightful surprises.
34. Pampering
Pampering you is an essential part of your intimate moments. It’s about creating an environment where you feel safe, cherished, and adored. Massages, sweet gestures, and taking the time to ensure your comfort show you just how much he cares.
35. Longevity
When you’re intimate, he doesn’t rush through it. Longevity means savoring each moment, making every touch count, and enjoying the connection you share. It’s like having a favorite song you both want to play on repeat, relishing every note that brings you closer together.
36. Reciprocity
Reciprocity in your intimate moments signifies a balanced give-and-take dynamic. He actively participates to ensure that both of your desires, needs, and boundaries are respected and fulfilled equally, strengthening the bond you share.
37. Savoring the moment
Savoring the moment involves both of you consciously appreciating each aspect of intimacy. It means he cherishes the emotional and physical connection you both share, focusing on the present, and enhancing the depth of your connection during these moments.
Commonly asked questions
Understanding the dynamics of lovemaking and intimacy is important in any relationship. Here are brief answers to some frequently asked questions to help you grasp these aspects of your connection.
-
What are the signs he is not making love to you?
If he’s distant emotionally, doesn’t prioritize your pleasure, or lacks intimate communication, he may not be making love but merely having physical relations. Genuine love-making involves emotional connection and mutual care.
-
How can I make him make love to me?
Build emotional connection through open communication, affection, and trust. Prioritize emotional intimacy, share fantasies, and explore each other’s desires to create an environment where love-making becomes a heartfelt expression.
-
How can I tell if he is only interested in sex?
Watch for signs like a lack of emotional connection, focus solely on physical aspects, or inconsistency in communication. If he isn’t interested in your emotional well-being or doesn’t respect your boundaries, it may be about sex, not love.
-
What are the benefits of lovemaking?
Lovemaking offers emotional closeness, stress relief, improved mood, and strengthened relationships. It fosters intimacy, bonding, and physical pleasure, enhancing your overall well-being and connection with your partner.
-
What are the risks of lovemaking?
Risks can include the potential for emotional attachment, unintended pregnancies, and sexually transmitted infections. Consensual and responsible intimacy, along with open communication about boundaries and safe practices, can help mitigate these risks.
Mastering the art of lovemaking
What are the signs he enjoys making love to you? Pay attention to the details around lovemaking. Think about what happens before, during, and after sex to decipher if your man enjoys making love with you.
Not all sex is lovemaking, but with these signals, you’ll be able to spot the difference and, based on that, communicate your needs to your partner well.
Your man doesn’t have to do all of these things to show signs he is making love to you, but a balanced combination is the key to look forward to.
Trusted by +5 Million People
Ask your question related to this topic & get the support you deserve from experts.
Share your valuable relationship tips with +5 million people
Share this article on
Want to have a happier, healthier marriage?
If you feel disconnected or frustrated about the state of your marriage but want to avoid separation and/or divorce, the marriage.com course meant for married couples is an excellent resource to help you overcome the most challenging aspects of being married.