10+ Narcissistic Traits in Females & How to Deal With Them

Narcissistic women exhibit a range of toxic traits that can make dealing with them challenging. These traits of a narcissistic woman include a need for constant attention, an exaggerated sense of self-importance, a lack of empathy for others, and a tendency to manipulate people and situations to their advantage. 

They may also engage in behaviors such as gaslighting, belittling others, and expecting special treatment. To deal with narcissistic traits in females, it is important to set clear boundaries, maintain your self-esteem, and seek support from others. 

You may also need to limit your interactions with them and seek professional help if the situation becomes overwhelming.

What is a narcissistic woman?

When it comes to the definition of a narcissistic woman, she has a personality disorder characterized by an excessive focus on herself and her own needs, desires, and accomplishments.

She may often seek attention and admiration from others and has a grandiose sense of self-importance. She may lack empathy for others and manipulate people and situations to her advantage. 

Narcissistic women may engage in behaviors such as belittling others, gaslighting, and expecting special treatment. This behavior can negatively impact her personal relationships and can be challenging for others to deal with. 

Narcissistic traits in females can often make them struggle to form deep, meaningful connections with others, and they may tend to put their own needs ahead of others.

Grady Shumway, LMHC, says

Understanding the traits of a narcissistic woman can help you navigate interactions more effectively and set healthy boundaries. Recognizing these behaviors early on can protect your emotional well-being and encourage you to seek supportive relationships that foster empathy and mutual respect.

10 common traits of a narcissistic woman

Narcissistic personality disorder in women can be challenging, but it is crucial to set clear boundaries and maintain your own self-esteem. Here are some telling traits of a narcissistic woman:

1. Grandiosity

A study found that narcissistic women often have an exaggerated sense of self-importance. The study mentioned that women with higher levels of narcissism tended to overestimate their abilities and achievements and had a sense of entitlement to special treatment.

They may believe they are superior to others and feel their needs and desires are more important than anyone else’s.

2. Lack of empathy

One of the narcissistic traits in females is that they may struggle to understand or care about other people’s feelings or perspectives. They may prioritize their own needs and desires over the needs of others, which can lead to a lack of empathy and consideration for those around them.

3. Manipulation

One of the traits of a narcissistic woman in a relationship is that they may use manipulation tactics to get what they want, such as guilt-tripping, gaslighting, or other forms of emotional manipulation. 

Narcissists may also be skilled at reading people and knowing how to push their buttons to get what they want.

Grady Shumway further adds,

By recognizing these manipulation tactics, you can empower yourself to respond with clarity and assertiveness. Establishing boundaries and seeking support from trusted friends or professionals can help you navigate these dynamics and maintain your emotional health.

4. Sense of entitlement

Narcissistic women may feel entitled to certain things, such as special treatment, admiration, or success. They may think they are owed something simply because of who they are rather than earning it through hard work or effort.

5. Need for admiration

Narcissistic traits in females can make them often crave attention and admiration from others. They may seek compliments, praise, and validation to boost their ego and sense of self-worth.

6. Lack of accountability

One of the symptoms of a narcissistic woman is that they avoid accountability. Narcissistic women may struggle to take responsibility for their actions or admit when they are wrong. They may deflect blame onto others or make excuses for their behavior.

7. Belittling behavior

So, narcissistic traits in females may make them engage in behavior that belittles or demeans others, such as making critical comments, minimizing others’ achievements, or mocking others’ flaws or weaknesses.

8. Impulsivity

One of the characteristics of narcissistic women is that they are impulsive. They may act impulsively without considering the consequences of their actions. They may make rash decisions or engage in risky behavior without thinking things through.

9. Inability to handle criticism

Narcissistic traits in females can make them struggle to handle criticism or rejection. They may become defensive, lash out, or cut ties with people who challenge their beliefs or behavior.

10. Lack of deep relationships

Narcissistic women may struggle to form deep, meaningful connections with others. They may prioritize their own needs and desires over the needs of others, which can make it challenging to build and maintain strong relationships.

How is a narcissistic woman different from a man?

While the core characteristics of narcissism are generally similar in men and women, there are some differences in how these traits of a narcissistic woman manifest. So, can women be narcissists?

Narcissistic men tend to display more overtly aggressive and domineering behavior, while narcissistic women may use covert tactics such as manipulation, guilt-tripping, or passive-aggressive behavior.

Narcissistic men often seek power and control over others, while narcissistic women may focus more on seeking attention, admiration, and validation. Narcissistic men may be more likely to engage in risky or impulsive behavior, while narcissistic women may be more calculating and strategic in their actions.

Additionally, societal expectations and gender norms may influence how narcissism is expressed in men and women. 

Men are often socialized (in many cultures) to be more dominant and assertive, which can reinforce and amplify narcissistic tendencies. Women, on the other hand, maybe socialized to prioritize relationships and emotional intelligence, which can make it harder to spot or diagnose narcissistic behavior in women.

Ultimately, while there may be differences in how narcissism is expressed in men and women, the underlying traits and tendencies are generally the same. It’s important to recognize and address narcissistic behavior regardless of the gender of the individual exhibiting it.

10+ ways to deal with a narcissistic woman

So, how to deal with a female narcissist? Dealing with a narcissistic woman can be challenging, but several strategies can help you manage the situation. Here are 10 ways to deal with a narcissistic woman:

1. Set clear boundaries

Establishing clear boundaries is essential when dealing with narcissistic traits in females. Make it clear what behavior is acceptable and what is not, and stick to these boundaries consistently. Also, clarify the consequences of crossing these boundaries. Consistently enforce these consequences if boundaries are violated.

2. Don’t engage in their drama

Narcissistic women thrive on drama and attention. Refuse to engage in their drama or get pulled into their emotional manipulation. Stay calm and composed, and don’t let their behavior affect you.

If you notice signs she is a narcissist, develop strategies to disengage quickly and efficiently when drama begins. This could include changing the subject or excusing yourself from the situation.

3. Stay focused on your own goals

Don’t let the narcissistic traits in females distract you from your own goals and priorities. Stay focused on your own life, and don’t let their traits get in the way of your success. You can maintain a sense of purpose and fulfillment despite their toxic influence by staying focused on your life.

Actively work on personal goals and maintain a support system that keeps you focused. This might involve setting specific, measurable objectives for yourself.

4. Avoid confrontation

Confronting a narcissistic woman directly can often make the situation worse. Instead, try to find a way to calmly and assertively communicate your needs and boundaries without engaging in a heated argument.

Learn and practice assertive communication techniques. This means expressing your needs and feelings clearly and respectfully without being aggressive.

5. Don’t take their behavior personally

Remember that the narcissistic traits in females are not about you – it’s about her own insecurities and needs. Don’t take their behavior personally; don’t let it affect your sense of self-worth.

Work on building your self-esteem and resilience. Engaging in activities that reinforce your sense of self-worth can help in not taking things personally.

6. Seek support

Dealing with a narcissistic woman can be emotionally draining. Seek support from your friends, family, or a therapist who can provide validation and understanding.

Talking to someone who understands what you’re going through can help you process your emotions and cope with the stress of the situation. It can also give you a better perspective and identify healthy ways to manage the relationship. 

7. Stay calm and composed

Narcissistic women may deliberately provoke or manipulate others to boost their egos. It’s important to remain composed and not let their behavior affect you. 

Responding emotionally or engaging in their game will only fuel their need for attention and control. Staying calm and detached, you can maintain your self-worth and avoid getting entangled in their drama.

8. Limit your interactions

Avoid engaging in conversations that are not necessary or spending more time with them than you need to. This will help reduce the opportunities for them to manipulate or provoke you. 

It’s also important to establish boundaries and stick to them to maintain your emotional well-being. Remember that taking care of yourself is a priority.

9. Don’t enable their behavior

Enabling narcissistic traits in females will only make the situation worse. It’s important to be firm and consistent in your boundaries and not give in to their demands or feed their ego. 

This means not allowing them to manipulate or control you and standing up for yourself when necessary. 

By maintaining your sense of self-worth and not enabling their behavior, you can protect yourself from their toxicity and maintain a healthy relationship dynamic. Remember, you are not responsible for their behavior, but you are responsible for how you respond to it.

10. Seek professional help

If the situation becomes overwhelming, seek professional help from a therapist who can provide guidance and support in dealing with narcissistic behavior.

Be proactive in seeking a therapist specializing in narcissistic abuse recovery. This can offer tailored strategies for your specific situation.

11. Use non-defensive communication

When communicating with a narcissistic woman, try to use non-defensive communication. This means responding to criticism or accusations without being defensive. By acknowledging their feelings or the content of what they’re saying without agreeing or escalating the situation, you can often avoid further conflict.

Practice active listening and empathy, even when disagreeing. This helps in maintaining a non-defensive stance and can de-escalate potential conflicts.

12. Focus on objective facts 

Narcissistic individuals often manipulate or distort reality to suit their needs. In your interactions, focus on objective facts and realities. This can help ground the conversation and reduce the effectiveness of any attempts at emotional manipulation or distortion of the truth.

Keep records of important conversations and agreements. This can be helpful in situations where facts are being distorted or manipulated.

FAQs

Dealing with a narcissistic wife’s traits can be a difficult and emotionally draining experience. 

However, by setting clear boundaries, seeking support, and staying focused on your goals and priorities, you can manage the situation and protect your mental and emotional well-being. 

Remember that you are not responsible for the narcissistic traits in females and their behavior, and don’t let their behavior affect your sense of self-worth.

• How does a female narcissist act?

A female narcissist typically exhibits an exaggerated sense of self-importance, a constant need for admiration, and a lack of empathy. She may act manipulatively, using charm and charisma to influence others. Often, she displays jealousy and competitiveness and may engage in belittling or demeaning behavior to assert her superiority.

• What are the tactics of a female narcissist?

The tactics of a female narcissist include gaslighting, where she manipulates others into questioning their reality. She often uses emotional manipulation, such as guilt-tripping or playing the victim, to control others. 

Triangulation, creating rivalries or tensions between people to maintain control, smear campaigns, and spreading false information to discredit others are also common tactics.

• What are the 5 main habitats of a narcissist?

   Narcissists thrive in environments where they can gain admiration and attention. Five main habitats include: 

   – Social media platforms, where they can curate an idealized self-image.

   – Corporate or leadership roles that provide power and status.

   – Competitive environments like sports or entertainment, which offer validation.

   – Romantic relationships, where they can dominate and control their partner.

   – Social circles that appreciate superficial traits like charm and attractiveness.

• Can a narcissistic woman ever change?

It is possible for a narcissistic woman to change, but it is unlikely without professional help and a strong commitment to self-reflection and personal growth. Narcissistic behavior is deeply ingrained and often stems from deep-seated insecurities and traumas. 

Without addressing these underlying issues, it is difficult for a narcissistic woman to make meaningful changes. 

However, with the right support and willingness to change, it is possible for a narcissistic woman to develop greater empathy, humility, and self-awareness. It is important to note that change is a difficult and ongoing process, and progress may be slow and inconsistent.

Dr. Ramani discusses in this video if a narcissist can change or heal:

In a nutshell

Dealing with a narcissistic woman can be challenging, but it is important to set clear boundaries, maintain your self-esteem, and seek support from others. The traits of a narcissistic woman include a need for constant attention, a lack of empathy, manipulation tactics, and a sense of entitlement. 

However, by staying focused on your own goals, avoiding confrontation, and seeking professional help if necessary, you can manage the situation and protect your mental and emotional well-being. 

Remember that the narcissistic woman’s behavior is not about you, and don’t let it affect your own sense of self-worth.