How Do You Know You Love Someone: 35 Telling Signs

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Ever wonder if the late-night texts, the uncontrollable butterflies, and the constant desire to be around that special someone mean more than just a passing crush? 

Maybe you find yourself, uncharacteristically, opening up completely, sharing your deepest fears and wildest dreams like you never have before. You crave to know everything about them, their favorite childhood memories, their secret talents, their hopes for the future. 

These intense feelings could be signs of true love, a powerful force that goes far beyond fleeting infatuation. True love is a complex tapestry woven with threads of affection, respect, understanding, and a deep sense of partnership. 

This article dives into learning how do you know you love someone, helping you navigate those confusing emotions and discover if you’ve stumbled upon something truly special.

How do you know you love someone: 35 signs

Determining whether you’re truly in love can be as mystifying as it is beautiful. Recognizing the signs that you’re falling deeply can guide you through the complexities of your emotions. Here are clear indicators to help you discern the depth of your feelings.

1. You keep on staring at them

If you frequently find yourself lost in their gaze, it could be a sign of deeper feelings. The more you look at them, the clearer it becomes—how do you know you love someone? It might just be when you can’t take your eyes off them.

• Example: At parties, you often find yourself glancing over to see what they’re doing, and just watching them talk makes you smile.

2. You wake up and go to bed with thoughts of them

Love can often feel exhilarating, similar to a euphoric high. This sensation can lead you to ask, “how do you know you love someone.” The excitement and happiness that surge through you when you think about or are with this person can be a strong indicator of romantic love.

• Example: Every morning, your first thought is about how they are, and at night, you drift to sleep imagining your next day together.

3. You feel high

Wondering how to know you love someone? Sometimes it can be tricky to know whether you love someone or not. That’s why most people will get stuck with the question, how do you know you love someone. 

In most cases, when you are falling in love with someone, you’ll feel high, and that’s normal for everyone. 

Now, if you don’t know why you have been acting the way you are acting, this is the reason – you are falling in love.

• Example: Being around them gives you a rush of euphoria, similar to feeling elated after a great workout.

4. You think about someone too often

The desire to see someone happy, to the extent that you actively contribute to their happiness, often leads to the question “when you love someone, how do you know?” Your actions aimed at improving their day or lifting their spirits can affirm the deep affection you feel towards them.

• Example: Throughout the day, your mind wanders to thoughts of what they’re doing or your next date.

5. You always want to see them happy

When you already love someone, you’ll feel like you want them to be happy every time. And, maybe if you didn’t know, compassionate love is a sign that you are getting into a healthy relationship. 

This means that you can do whatever it takes to make sure your partner is happy at all times. Therefore, if you find yourself preparing dinner on behalf of your partner when they are busy with her assignments, then you must know you are falling in love.

• Example: You plan a surprise dinner at their favorite restaurant just to see them smile.

6. You are stressed of late

Experiencing stress in the early stages of love can be confusing. Love induces emotional highs and lows, and feeling anxious or unsettled might be due to the vulnerability that comes with opening your heart to someone new.

• Example: You notice you’re more anxious than usual, worrying about how your actions might affect your relationship.

7. You feel some jealousy

Mild jealousy can occur when you deeply care about someone and fear losing their attention to others. If you’re asking, “how do you know you love someone,” consider whether your jealousy stems from deep feelings of commitment and exclusivity.

• Example: When they talk about how fun their coworker is, you can’t help but feel a twinge of jealousy.

8. You prioritize them over other activities

Spending time with your loved one is a reward in itself, so you start prioritizing them over other activities. 

When you spend time with them, your stomach says, “I’m in love with this feeling,” and craves for more, pushing you to rearrange your plans and put them on top.

• Example: You skip your weekly night out with friends to help them prepare for a big presentation at work.

9. You are falling in love with new things

If you really love someone, you will find yourself doing things you were never used to doing. For example, if you did not love watching football, your new partner can influence you to start watching.

If you realize that you are giving life a different approach, you don’t have to worry because you are just falling in love.

• Example: Even though you’ve never liked sushi, you find yourself enjoying sushi dates because they love it.

10. Time flies when you are with them

The saying “time flies when you’re having fun” is especially true “when you love someone.” This phenomenon occurs because you are fully immersed in your experiences together, making every moment feel precious and fleeting.

• Example: You spend the whole afternoon together, and before you know it, it’s already evening, yet it feels like only an hour has passed.

11. You empathize with them

True empathy involves feeling what your partner feels and offering support without hesitation. If you find yourself deeply affected by their joys and sorrows, reflecting on “how do you know if you love someone,” this emotional resonance might be your answer.

Grady Shumway, LMHC, says

Empathy while falling in love involves the ability to understand and share the feelings of your partner on a deep and emotional level, building a strong connection and mutual support as you face the ups and downs of the relationship together.

Doing things for them comes easy because you want them to feel good, and you can sense their distress.

• Example: When they’re upset about a tough day at work, you feel genuinely upset too, and try to offer comfort.

12. You are changing for the better

When love inspires you to improve yourself, it’s a profound motivator. These changes, driven by your desire to be better for both yourself and your partner, underscore the transformative power of love.

• Example: Their positive outlook has motivated you to start exercising and eating healthier.

13. You love their quirks

All people have unique characteristics. So, when you fall in love with someone, you will realize you have picked a few characteristics that make them unique, and that’s normal.

You’ll start feeling like you want to imitate how they talk, how they walk, and probably how they crack jokes.

Such things keep a relationship going. Sure, they may not seem serious, but they are detrimental to your relationship.

• Example: The way they mispronounce certain words becomes endearing to you, and you find it charming rather than annoying.

14. You imagine a future together

Daydreaming about future scenarios with someone, from mundane daily activities to major life events, is a hallmark of deep affection. This planning is often accompanied by the realization, “how to know if you love someone,” as you envision a shared life path.

• Example: You find yourself daydreaming about buying a home or traveling the world together.

15. You crave physical closeness

The intense desire for physical touch and closeness with someone signifies a strong emotional and physical attraction. This need for intimacy is often accompanied by the thought, “how do you know if you love someone,” as it highlights the depth of your emotional connection.

• Example: You look for any excuse to hold hands, hug, or simply be close to them, feeling more connected through touch.

16. Being with them feels easy

Any relationship comes with its own set of struggles and arguments. However, when in love, the priority is the relationship, not your pride. 

So although you might bicker at times, your relationship doesn’t seem hard to maintain, and you enjoy being a part of it. This feeling can make you ponder, “how do you know you love someone?” The ease despite difficulties can be a key indicator.

• Example: Even when you disagree, you find resolving conflicts with them is easier because you both prioritize your relationship.

17. You want to spend maximum time with them

When you fall in love, one of the greatest answers to how do you know you love someone is when you want to spend plenty of time with them, and it never seems enough. It’s not necessary that you have solid plans of what to do when you both are together but just having them around feels enough.

No matter what mood you are in, their company is always welcome.

• Example: You find yourself declining offers to do other things because you just want to hang out with them, even if you’re just watching TV.

18. You wish their happiness

Do you know what it feels like loving someone? 

Well, another key sign of how to know if you love someone is when you really wish for their happiness. You wish to make them feel good all the time. No matter if their actions are not always right, you do not wish ill on them.

• Example: You go out of your way to do little things that will make their day easier or brighter.

19. You don’t hold grudges

One of the signs you love someone is when you don’t hold grudges against them or blame them for anything wrong that happened to you. You are forgiving and patient and choose to think rationally when it comes to them.

• Example: After disagreements, you are quick to forgive and forget because you value your relationship more than winning an argument.

20. You are okay being yourself in front of them

You feel comfortable being your weird self in front of the person. Whether it’s humming your favorite song despite being a bad singer or cracking bad jokes, you are okay doing random stuff without any hesitation.

• Example: You feel comfortable enough to sing off-key as you cook together, not worrying about being judged.

21. You feel the urge to say ‘I love you’

You want to say ‘i love you’ to the person, and you are unable to control yourself. Whether or not you already confessed your love, I love you remains at the tip of your tongue.

• Example: The words ‘I love you’ are always on the tip of your tongue, and you feel a strong desire to express your feelings.

22. You feel ready for commitment

If you wish to know how do you know you love someone, you must try to gauge your readiness for commitment. 

People can be scared of commitment and think twice before treading that path. They want to be fully sure that commitment is the right thing to do and if they are fully ready for this big decision.

So, if you love someone, commitment doesn’t scare you. You feel completely ready for the plunge.

• Example: The thought of being exclusive, moving in together, or even marriage feels right and exciting, not scary.

23. You feel their pain

How do you know you love someone?

You are able to sense their sadness and have a lot of empathy towards them. You try to solve their issues because you can’t see them in pain.

This could also lead to you doing beyond your capacity to help them get out of their pain but you want to do that happily. 

• Example: When they are heartbroken over a personal loss, you share in their sorrow deeply, almost as if it were your own.

24. You behave affectionately around them

No matter the kind of personality you have, you behave extra lovingly around them. Your personality softens in front of them. 

So, if you wonder how do you know if you love someone, check your change in the way you behave. All thanks to the love hormone, oxytocin that gives you this spike of attraction and love.\

• Example: Even if you’re not usually a touchy-feely person, you find yourself reaching out to touch their arm or back when you’re near them.

25. You are awaiting their texts

You are glued to your phone most of the time because you keep awaiting their texts, or are continuously busy on the phone chatting with them. If you do this and feel anxious for that one text or call, this is the answer to how do you know you love someone.

• Example: You keep checking your phone eagerly, waiting for any message from them and feeling a rush of excitement when you do get a text.

26. You feel safe

Our bodies have a way of recognizing that sense of security. So, if you feel safe and vulnerable, it’s because of your body releasing oxytocin and vasopressin that lets you have a feeling of long-lasting love.

In such situations, your inner self knows the safe space and allows you to open up to the person.

• Example: With them, you feel a sense of security that allows you to share your deepest fears and dreams.

27. You feel adventurous

It’s when you start feeling adventurous that you question “how do you know you love someone.” When you fall in love, you want to be adventurous together and learn more about them through shared experiences and challenges. 

You are not scared of wearing your least favorite colors or going on the most adventurous rides. You are ready to add that novelty.

• Example: You’re normally not one for spontaneous plans, but with them, you’re excited to try new activities like rock climbing or salsa dancing.

28. Their opinion matters

Usually, when the relationship is casual, the opinion of the other person hardly affects our life and mostly, we don’t let it affect our lives. However, it’s not the same thing when things are serious.

With this person, you involve them in making big plans and are ready to welcome their viewpoint because they are important to you and you value their opinion.

• Example: Before making decisions, you seek their perspective because it deeply matters to you, influencing your choices.

29. Almost everything reminds you of them

No matter what you do and how busy you are, almost everything around you reminds you of them. If you are having coffee, you will think about having coffee with them. 

If you are busy with friends, you will think how happy you feel around them. From any random color to a song, you will associate everything with them.

• Example: When you see a movie ad they mentioned, or hear a song they like, you immediately think of them.

30. You feel comfortable making sacrifices

You are ready to make adjustments for them and a few sacrifices to make them happy doesn’t really bother you or feels like a burden. You are okay taking care of them and making them feel happy with your slight compromises.

• Example: You don’t mind changing your schedule or missing out on personal time to help them with important tasks.

31. You seek their input on decisions

When you love someone, their thoughts and opinions become crucial to your decision-making process. Whether it’s choosing a new apartment or deciding on a career move, you find yourself seeking their advice and valuing their input, showing how deeply how do you know you love someone affects your life choices.

• Example: When considering a new job offer, you discuss it with them to know their thoughts on how it would affect your relationship.

32. You share your successes and failures

Love involves not just sharing the good times but also the bad. When you’re truly in love, you’re compelled to share every success and every setback because you see your partner as a key supporter in your life’s journey. This is a vital aspect of how to know you love someone.

• Example: Whether you get a promotion or face a project setback, they’re the first person you call.

33. You make future plans including them

When you think about the future, they are always a part of it. 

From planning next year’s vacation to imagining your life in ten years, your plans invariably include them, reflecting your deep emotional investment and desire for a long-term partnership. This foresight is often a response to wondering how do I know if I love someone.

• Example: When planning your vacation days, you coordinate with their schedule to ensure you can take trips together.

34. You find joy in their idiosyncrasies

Their little habits or peculiarities, which might annoy others, end up endearing them even more to you. You find joy and comfort in their unique traits and behaviors, which sets them apart from anyone else in your eyes. Such acceptance is one of the signs you love someone.

• Example: Their habit of doing a little dance when cooking dinner makes you laugh and love them even more.

35. Their presence calms you

In moments of stress or anxiety, just being around them or hearing their voice can soothe and calm you. Their presence acts like a safe harbor, reassuring you amidst life’s chaos, answering the question, how do you know when you love someone. 

• Example: After a stressful day, just sitting next to them or hearing their voice can make everything seem okay again.

Why is it important to know if you are in love

Understanding that you love someone is crucial for numerous reasons. It affects personal fulfillment, relationship dynamics, and decision-making. Here’s why recognizing love is important:

• Clarity in Feelings: Enhances understanding of your emotions, influencing relationship decisions.
• Emotional Health: Boosts fulfillment and security, crucial for mental well-being.
• Relationship Development: Fosters deeper intimacy, trust, and bonding.
• Personal Growth: Inspires empathy and self-improvement.
• Communication: Motivates honest expression of feelings.
• Decision Making: Guides life choices in harmony with relationship goals.
• Resilience: Strengthens ability to handle relationship challenges.

5 reasons there can be confusion about whether you love someone

Determining the nature of your feelings in a relationship can often be complex. Understanding how you know you love someone requires introspection and awareness of the nuances that distinguish love from other emotions. 

This exploration can help you discern the depth of your feelings and the authenticity of your connection.

1. Infatuation often feels like love

In the early stages of a relationship, the intense excitement and attraction you feel can easily be mistaken for love. This period, characterized by an overwhelming rush of emotions, can cloud your ability to judge how do you know you love someone, mixing up infatuation with deeper feelings.

• Address this by: Give it time. Allow your relationship to mature through different experiences and challenges. Time will help differentiate between the fleeting excitement of infatuation and the stable, enduring presence of love.

2. Fear of being alone influences feelings

Sometimes, the discomfort or fear of being alone can lead someone to cling to a relationship, mistaking dependency or comfort for love. This confusion can make it difficult to determine how do you know if you love someone, as you may prioritize companionship over genuine emotional connection.

• Address this by: Focus on self-awareness and personal fulfillment. Engage in activities that make you happy and develop your independence. Being comfortable with yourself alone allows you to enter relationships for the right reasons, not just to fill a void.

3. Past experiences skew perceptions of love

Your previous relationships and the examples of love you’ve been exposed to can significantly influence how you perceive love. If you’ve experienced dysfunctional relationships, you might misinterpret what healthy love looks like, confusing intensity or neediness for true, deep affection.

• Address this by: Reflect on your past relationships and seek patterns that may have skewed your perception of what love should be. Consider therapy or counseling to work through unresolved feelings and gain a healthier outlook on love.

4. High emotions create confusion

During emotionally charged moments, such as after a significant life event or during a crisis, feelings of closeness and dependency can intensify. These high emotions might make you feel more connected to someone than you actually are, leading to confusion about when you love someone and what that truly means.

• Address this by: Strive for emotional balance. Before making significant decisions about your relationship, seek stability in your emotional state. Avoid committing during peak emotional times and instead choose moments of calm reflection to assess your feelings.

Also, watch the following TED talk where Dr. Terri Orbuch a professor of sociology at Oakland University and a research professor at the Institute for Social Research at the University of Michigan discusses signals to distinguish between lust and love, and how to reignite that lustful desire in loving long-term relationships.

5. Social pressures shape your views

External pressures—from media, culture, family, or friends—can also shape your expectations of what love should feel like, look like, or be like. These societal influences can make it challenging to determine if your feelings are genuine love or a fulfillment of expected norms. 

• Address this by: Define what love means to you independently of external expectations. Communicate openly with your partner about your beliefs and desires, creating a shared understanding that is personal and unique to your relationship, rather than one shaped by external pressures. 

In a nutshell

How do you know you love someone? This question invites you to reflect on the depth of your feelings and the quality of your relationship. 

Recognizing true love involves more than just emotional affection; it includes thoughtful actions, deep respect, and a shared vision for the future. 

By evaluating the signs discussed, you can gain clarity about your emotions. 

Grady Shumway further adds,

Telling someone you love them takes strength as it requires vulnerability and the willingness to express your deepest emotions, risking rejection or uncertainty in return.

True love is not just about feeling connected; it’s about growing together and making a conscious choice every day to support, cherish, and respect each other. 

Understanding whether your feelings are rooted in love can transform your approach to the relationship, providing a foundation of trust and mutual appreciation that enriches both lives.