7 Ways Date Night Can Improve Communication in Relationships

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Healthy communication is critical to a happy, fulfilling relationship. It’s also hard work. Fortunately, there are ways to improve communication while also having fun. Date nights! Once the honeymoon stage has passed and real life sets in, things like date nights often get pushed to the wayside. 

But, it’s in that one-on-one time that we can access deeper connections, have lengthy conversations, learn more about our partners, enjoy their energy, and hear about the big and small things about their days and lives. 

We are curious and eager to hear and to be heard. Something beautiful happens between a couple when intentional dialogue happens in a space and time that is set aside for connection via communication. 

A date night can improve communication in the later stages of a relationship as it forces you to slow down and be present with your partner. They provide the opportunity to look at your partner and feel and express the things that keep you together, like gratitude, admiration, and humor. 

Many things can happen on a date when you’re just there for each other’s company and not distracted by all the other things going on in life. Just like you require self-care and attention, so does your relationship.

7 benefits of date night for communication

A date night can improve communication between couples in various ways. Below, I break down 7 ways that regular date nights (or date days!) can strengthen the communication between you and your partner.

1. New experiences grow communication

Date nights allow for new, exciting experiences together, get you out of the monotony of daily life, and give you something new to talk about. 

Coordinating a date requires discussing plans and maybe even doing some problem-solving on the go; planning the date is something you must practically communicate about and requires the attention of both people involved.

Planning anything will often highlight the strengths and weaknesses of a relationship; if someone has a short temper, their patience may get tested in a planning process. If someone is really organized, the planning part will come as second nature. 

On the opposite hand, though, is the idea of not planning every detail. 

Spontaneity in your relationship, on date nights specifically, can really open your eyes to how your partner reacts to new experiences that aren’t planned and can be a moment of mutual discovery, something that always has the potential to feel special between two people.

A date night can improve communication by offering these new experiences and challenges. Improving communication through date nights is a testament to how these shared, novel experiences can significantly enhance the way partners interact with each other, understand one another’s perspectives, and strengthen their bond.

2. Learning about your partner opens more communication.

Date nights give you the opportunity to get to know more about your partner. You learn more about their interests, likes, and dislikes. 

There are chances for communication about even trivial things like what kind of candy they like at the movie theater or if they’re the type always to order dessert after dinner. 

Something like cooking together can often open up discussions about fond memories of cooking with family in childhood or favorite recipes from your family’s kitchen. Expressing yourself on a date builds the muscle of expressing yourself in your relationship overall. 

A kind of “extended” date night can improve communication by including reading the same book as your partner. Doing this and coming together for discussion is a perfect opportunity to learn more about not only your partner but also yourself. 

It can highlight shared values and even some things you have different perspectives about from what you read. The ability to find things you may disagree on but can discuss in a connected way is vital to the longevity of a relationship.

3. Collaboration = Communication.

The ability to collaborate with your partner is crucial to the health of your relationship. This is an area where something like cooking or just planning a date can really highlight this as a strength for a couple. 

Dates like game night require collaboration along with nonverbal communication. It lets you understand more about your partner’s thought process and how they interpret the world around them. A date night can improve communication by promoting an environment for collaboration.

4. Important things have a space on date night.

Date night gives intentional space to discuss things that need to be talked about. If you’re new to date night routine, you can do something like make a list of things you need to discuss – ideally, things that won’t stir up conflict. 

The things that may be nagging you in the back of your mind can be brought up and discussed on a routine basis. Plans and decisions can be made, even planning for the next date.

If you’re new to date nights, I like to compare it to the viral sensation of the “Sunday reset.” A Sunday Reset gets the house or space ready for the week ahead. It prepares a space for the day-in and day-out activities that occur. 

It even sets the space for potentially unexpected situations, such as guests. It opens the space to be prepared for anything. Yes, it is about cleaning up for the coming week, but even more so, it’s a routine or ritual that sets up the environment for success. 

Date nights can provide similar benefits for your relationship. That time can be used to connect and build a bond with your partner and strengthen it for whatever comes your way that week. 

Date nights are the relationship reset that ensures the next little bit can run as smoothly as possible. A date night can improve communication by offering this structured opportunity for meaningful discussions.

5. Communication builds trust, which is foundational to the relationship.

Trust is a foundational part of a relationship, and trust is strengthened when connection is fueled by healthy communication. Effective communication in relationships is vital, and regular date nights are a perfect way to cultivate this. 

Date nights reinforce to your partner that you are a safe space for their thoughts and feelings to be heard. The intentional, more lengthy time of a date translates into the shorter, more passing bits of communication bits that come later in the week.

6. Date nights can increase satisfaction and joy, and happy couples communicate better.

Find something to laugh about. Having humor as a tool in your relationship can relieve tension and stress that builds up in relationships. Incorporating laughter can make both partners more satisfied and fulfilled in their relationship, making things significantly easier to talk about.

Laughter and humor are also key tools when it comes to building resilience and facilitating communication when the going gets tough. 

Life never comes without bumps in the road. If you and your partner can bounce back from adversity and communicate through the struggle, the times of bliss become that much better.

Watch this video as Steph Anya, a marriage therapist, shares 10 tips for good communication in marriage:

7. Date nights improve listening skills, and healthy communication requires the ability to listen.

Date night conversations are about not only expressing yourself but also listening effectively. John Gottman, researcher and expert in the field of couples and marriage, says that effective listening involves empathy, interest, and without judgment or solutions. Listening to understand is truly a skill that often needs to be learned. 

A date night can improve communication by equally sharing the workings of your inner world with your partner and hearing what is going on with them. The goal here is that you naturally want to learn more and more about your partner, so listening will become more natural over time.

Authenticity’s role in date night and communication

Authenticity is fuel for healthy communication. It allows both people to express their needs, wants, and perspectives. Lean into the connection happening by focusing on listening to your partner. 

Slowing down on a date night can allow you to access all your true feelings toward your partner- joy, gratitude, excitement, and maybe even a glimmer of butterflies. 

If you’re able to tap into a more authentic part of yourself on a date, that will likely result in improved communication within the relationship. 

If you bring your authentic self, that can show your partner that you are a safe place for them to be authentic as well. Date night is a blast when both partners show up authentically, and communication isn’t so hard after all.