Sexting: What Is It and How to Sext

Listen to this article

Sexting is a portmanteau of two words: sex and texting. Traditionally speaking, texting included an exchange of dialogue through texts. We can now send images, videos, and whatnot with technological advancements. The word sexting thus means sending sexually explicit messages through a digital device.

Couples who are in long-distance relationships or want to make the most of their time away from their partner indulge in sexting to feel the physical proximity that they lack otherwise. It is a great way for couples to bond and feel a connection, even being physically apart.

What is sexting?

Sexting is sending flirty sexual messages, images, and GIFs to express sexual interest in the partner. The rise of the internet and mobile phones and the advent of technology has given a way to a new form of sexual texting called sexting.

It’s usually a harmless way of flirting. However, if proper sexting rules aren’t followed, it can be offensive and hurtful.

Hence, it becomes important to keep sexting healthy, fun, and non-toxic.

5 Examples of Sexting 

First and foremost, you need to have the consent of the person you want to start sexting with. Once you have done that, here are some examples you can start with. 

1. You can always start with simple sexting ideas such as, “I can’t stop thinking about you/your body/the kiss/your lips, etc. 
2. If you have established a good connection with the person and can go ahead with more explicit talks, you can say something like, “I get so turned on when I think about you kissing me.”
3. If you have done it a couple of times, you can always begin by asking, “What are you wearing?”, “Can you send me a picture?” etc.
4. If you want it to be more tempting, you can always tell them, “I am tracing (any part of your body) and thinking about you, and this is driving me crazy,” “Do you know where my hands are and what am I doing to you?”, etc. 
5. Sexting ideas can be more captivating if you have established a secure connection between you. You can tell them, ” I am taking (Piece of cloth) off while thinking about you,” “If only you could hear the noises I would make right now,” ” I want to do it in this position,” etc. 

What is the difference between sexting and cybersex?

Before you learn how to sext, you need to understand the difference between sexting and cybersex. Sexting and cybersex are very similar but not the same thing. 

Sexting is mostly about talking sexually via text, pictures, or videos. It is done via message, a mix of sex and text, hence the name sexting. It is majorly done via phone and includes different kinds of media shared via text. 

However, cybersex means having a sexual conversation or calling on a computer. You can use chatrooms or cybersex websites. Some dating websites also offer the option for cybersex.

According to Maggie Martinez, a licensed clinical social worker:

This is not typically what couples choose to do but to each their own!

It can also happen via text but typically includes videos or video chat. 

Laptops and computers have webcams to make it easier, but now that phones too come with better cameras, people use their phones or tablets for cyber sex. 

Another thing that differentiates cybersex from sexting is that you can also include the use of sex toys while doing cybersex to enhance the overall experience. 

How sexting works in relationships

Sexting can work wonders in establishing intimacy if you know how to sext right. All you need to do is to match the mood and timing with your partner. It has many benefits, including:- 

It makes you feel closer to your partner and builds a deeper bond. 

It makes them feel secure and attached to their partner and reduces the fear of abandonment. 

It reduces relationship anxiety and creates a comfort zone between partners. 

It works like magic for long-distance couples as it helps them stay connected when they can’t meet longer in person. 

Watch this video to learn more about how to sext. 

How do you start good sexting?

Like every game, sexting has its own set of dos and don’ts. To play the game well and maximize its fun element, please pay by the sexting rules.

People might create more rules for sexting for themselves, but the basic boundaries of sexting are established by the following do’s and don’ts of sexting.

Do’s of Sexting

Here are some must-do’s that can’t be overlooked while learning how to sext.

1. Consent comes above all.
2. Less is more.
3. Send a sext to your partner while she is out with friends.
4. Take them by surprise and keep the fun quotient high.
5. Show you are really into it.

Don’ts of Sexting

Some rules can’t be compromised upon in sexting messages. Have a look:

1. Don’t go overboard with the sex talk.
2. Don’t forget to lock your private pictures.
3. Never click nudes with your face in them.
4. Don’t make your partner uncomfortable.
5. Don’t engage in cellular infidelity.

15 Sexting Tips

Sexting is no easy task. To become a pro at sexting, the below-mentioned sexting tips come in handy to ace at the sexting game. With these tips, you will learn how to sext like a pro.

It’s an art, and these tips will surely make an artist.

As Maggie Martinez explains:

Again, make sure that they are willing and consenting to receiving these messages.

Make sure you time your texts properlyTiming is everything. Make sure you are texting your partner at the right moment and not at awkward times when they are dining with their family or friends. While learning how to sext, timing is very crucial.

1. Don’t rush into it

Take it slow. Remember, slow and steady wins the race. Building up the sex game takes time. Chances are, if you rush it, it won’t be as enjoyable as otherwise.

2. Don’t over-push your boundaries

While it’s important to experiment and try new things to reignite the passion, it’s also essential not to over-step out of your comfort zone. After all, one performs best in their own territory.

3. Nothing works like visuals

This is true, without a doubt. People are known to respond best to visuals, which keeps them excited, engaged, and involved.

4. Protect your private pictures

One must stay aware and vigilant that their private pictures stay private and that their privacy isn’t compromised at any given time.

5. Give your partner a heads-up before sharing something dirty

Keep awkward moments at bay by informing your partner beforehand that you are about to share naughty texts. It will give them a heads-up so they can make proper arrangements.

6. Get acquainted with emoji sex code

It’s best to follow a proper emoji sex code to avoid any conflicts or judgments. Additionally, it makes the sexting process even more exciting.

7. Personalize the experience

To make the whole sexting experience exciting, one must draw from personal experiences and try to personalize them and not copy from the how to sext templates.

8. Open up like never before and show your fun side

Your partner needs to see your vulnerable side. It shows them that you trust them and are willing to be fully transparent. Surprise them with your fun and fearless side.

9. Ask Questions

Show your curiosity towards your partner by asking questions and expressing your interest in getting to know her better.

Related Reading: 125 Good Relationship Questions To Ask Your Partner

10. Make it interactive with memes and GIFs

Memes and GIFs are a great way to keep the sexting conversation going and serve as entertainment tools and conversation fillers.

11. Don’t forget to have fun with it

Sexting might seem tedious, but you have to have fun with it. Make it playful by adding fun elements, and enjoy the process.

12. Never get too technical

Nobody wants to open a dictionary and find any word’s meaning while sexting. It will just break the flow and take the fun away.

13. Work on the details

Research extensively on the likes and dislikes of your partner and make the sexting process as comprehensive as possible.

14. Mix it up with dirty talk and naughty texts

Before the conversation heads the boring alley, mix it up with fun elements such as naughty texts, dirty talk, etc., to avoid boredom and dullness.

Sexting messages examples

If you are looking for how to sext at different stages of the conversation, we bring to you the best sexting message examples for each stage of the conversation. These examples perfectly answer the how to sext question for every possible situation.

Starting Off

Discover some of the best ways to start the conversation.

1. I want you to lie back and let me take care of you tonight.
2. I’m going to make you beg for it.
3. I’ve got a surprise waiting for you.
4. My clothes are coming off the second you get home.
5. I’m going to let you do anything you want to me.

Requesting

Get your requests acknowledged with the following messages.

1. I want to make you come.
2. I need you inside of me right now.
3. I want you to be really rough.
4. Put it in my mouth.
5. I want you to tease me until I can’t take it any longer.

Fantasize

Express your deepest fantasies in words with these texts.

1. It’s so hot to imagine you tying me up.
2. I like thinking about you touching yourself.
3. I’m picturing you and me with another person.
4. I love thinking about you spanking me and pulling my hair.
5. I read this article about anal today, and it got me thinking.

Teasing

Tease your partner and leave them craving for more.

1. I’m touching myself right now, thinking about you.
2. I’m so wet right now.
3. I won’t let you come until you beg me for permission.
4. It’s too bad you’re not here right now.
5. I thought of something I wanted to do to you tonight.

Memories

Relive the old cherished moments through nostalgic sexting messages.

1. I miss feeling you inside of me.
2. I want you to do exactly what you did last time we [fill in the blank].
3. I can’t imagine ever coming as hard as I did when you [fill in the blank].
4. I can’t get last night out of my mind.
5. Remember that time we did [fill in the blank]?

Compliments

Make your partner blush by praising them with compliments.

1. You always feel so good inside of me.
2. I’ve never felt as attracted to anyone else as I am to you.
3. I love the way you make me feel.
4. You make me so wet.
5. I can’t control myself when I’m near you.

Keeping Things Going

Keep the love wheel spinning with sexting messages.

1. That turns me on so much.
2. Your messages have me so distracted.
3. I love when you talk like that.
4. What else will you do to me?
5. What are you wearing right now?

Wrapping Things Up

It’s time to wrap up. Use these sexting messages to conclude.

1. I don’t want to finish until you tell me I’m allowed.
2. You better keep all this in mind next time we see each other.
3. I’m going to need to do laundry after this.
4. All I can think about is you bending me over something and giving it to me hard.
5. If you were here, I’d ensure it was a good night for both of us.

How to respond to sexting?

Responding to sexts can be tricky. Especially when you are just learning how to sext, you need to be wary of your responses. Sometimes you are not in the mood for sexting, and sometimes not. So, how do you tackle both of these situations? 

We bring to you some sample sexting responses that will give you an idea of how you should be responding to sexting.

When you are not into it

If you don’t feel like it and would rather avoid sexting, these messages are perfect for expressing your disinterest.

1. Let’s play the quiet game. I’ll start.
2. They say life is full of disappointment. I guess I can add this conversation to that list.
3. Can’t respond, getting a manicure!
4. Wow, now I know exactly what I don’t want from a date.
5. I don’t accept unsolicited pitches, have your agent contact my office.

When you are in the mood for it

Make use of these sexting messages to express your interest in sexting.

1. You know, I’ve been waiting for you to sext me all day. It isn’t polite to keep someone waiting.
2. I was just about to sext you! Great minds do think alike.
3. I’d ask you what you’re wearing, but I’d rather picture you naked
4. I wonder if you can work my body like you’re working your keyboard.
5. If you’re this good with your words, I can’t wait to see what you can do with your hands.

Sexting emojis

Here are some famous sexting emojis that are commonly used as codewords for sex talk. Make good use of these emojis to keep up with the sexting trends.

Swimming Man Emoji

Excite your partner by sharing this emoji with them to make them ponder about how you are going to pleasure them orally.

Peach Emoji

If you feel the need to describe your partner’s booty in an emoji form, make use of the peach symbol.

Eggplant Emoji

Deemed as the phallus emoji, this emoji is perfect for naughty and dirty sexts.

Monkey Emoji

Show your shy side with the monkey emoji after sending an embarrassing text.

Angel Emoji

This is a great emoji to end the sexting, especially if you played the shy card initially.

Devil Emoji

Devil Emoji highlights your naughty side and is great to tillitate your partner more.

Fire Emoji

This emoji comes in handy to express the hotness quotient to your partner.

Eyes Emoji

This is perfect for showing your amusement and that your mind is blown and hence eyes are 

popping out.

Tongue sticking out the side of your face emoji

This serves as perfect validation for your partner that you find them edible and rather delicious.

Drooling Emoji

Convey to your partner that you are turned on by their actions with the drooling emoji.

More on how to sext

Here is one of the most asked questions regarding how to sext. 

• What is 8 in sexting?

Number 8 is frequently used code in sexting. It is commonly used for oral sex. When you say the number 8, it sounds like “ate,” the past tense of eating, and we all know that eating is used as slang when we talk about oral sex. 

That’s the only reason why people use the number 8 in sexting. 

Final thought

Sexting is indeed a great way to spice up your love life.

Engaging in sexting with a girl or guy not only brings in a sense of adventure and excitement but also helps establish an intimate bond with your partner.

Social worker Maggie Martinez further explains:

It can help you feel closer to one another, especially if you are separated by distance.

Use the above-mentioned tips to script some blazing hot sexting messages, turn on your partner, and see the temperature scorching.